Well by far the hardest part of my work on this podcast is reading the sorrow filled

emails that we get and especially those from parents who have lost young children.

Some of you who are listening are enduring tremendous pain which is so evident in

the stories that you share with us and this sorrow of losing a child is only made heavier when that

loss may be connected to a parent's own decision as is in the case in this email from an

anonymous woman.

Pastor John I have been passing through a very this email from an anonymous woman.

Pastor John, I have been passing through a very dark and hard time

since the recent loss of my unborn baby girl.

My expected delivery day passed,

and I was told to go to the hospital for an induced labor

I delayed that decision trusting that I would eventually deliver by baby girl

without any forced labor needed.

A week later I was told my baby died in the womb.

I was shattered by the news, feel directly responsible for my child's death.

I feel God should have given me a sign or something.

Why did he allow my baby to die? It's been seven weeks and it still feels like yesterday

the pain is fresh every day. My heart is broken. I cry

whenever I remember the whole scenario. I find it hard to pray and when I do I now doubt if God still hears me I'm way

down to the point that I feel my faith failing. When I was in Africa in 1996, visiting missionaries,

I met a young Quaker missionary couple

who had been there for 15 years.

...