I should have known better to see what I could see.

My black shroud holding down my feeling.

So, John, when did you start taking medication?

It was about two years ago.

I'm the type of person who will avoid medication at all costs if I can help it.

So I went through attempting anything I could think of or that I could read online,

homeopathic stuff, you know, vitamin D supplements.

I was working out heavily, you know, like five days a week. I just thought, well, you know,

this is probably seasonal effective disorder or, you know, environmental, you know, because I had a lot of

stuff going on with my job at the time, too.

I was unhappy in my career. And so there were a lot of other external factors. And so, yeah,

about two years ago, I finally got to the point where I was like, okay, this isn't working.

And I'm about to start a family. And I don't ever want my daughter to see me like this.

So was your wife pregnant at the time?

I think it was right before she got pregnant. So maybe we're going on possibly three years now,

I think. And so it was, I know we were definitely actively trying at that point. And I was like, okay, I have to get this straightened out.

Because, you know, I don't know, people probably aren't, you know, who don't suffer from depression, probably aren't as familiar with the fact that there are definitely hereditary aspects to it.

And it definitely runs in my family. I've got a brother who who takes medication. I've got my dad as well and we're pretty we're pretty certain, fairly certain that my

grandfather did as well. Yeah. Undiagnosed and untreated, but we're fairly certain that he

suffered from it for a large part of

his life. So looking back now, he saw a doctor, I'm guessing, family doctor, and he put you on

something. What did he put you on? So yeah, I started out, I started going to a counselor,

...