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Search for Dr. Laura's Deep Dive podcast Deep Dive, Dr. Laura's Deep Dive podcast. When coming out, tests family ties.

Children yearn for their parents' love. We've all sought our parents' approval at some point.

Our kids want to make us proud and not disappoint us. At the same time, parents have hopes and dreams for their children. Most of us

have some vision of how their lives will turn out. So it's understandable that the topic of coming

out can be difficult for both children and parents alike.

I had a listener, Paul, who called to share his coming out experience.

At around 25, he came to terms with his sexuality, but could not quite muster the courage to tell his family.

Fortunately for him, one of his sisters guessed his secret

and offered to be the one to tell the parents.

Within days, his father, who had never been the warm, fuzzy type,

who checked up on his kids, called Paul to say that they were processing the news and wanted to make sure

he knew that they loved him very much. Over the years, Paul's relationship with his parents

became stronger than ever, he even moved back to his small, conservative hometown in order to

stay close. Paul said, quote, by me coming out, the elephant

that had always been in the room was given a chance to exit. I lost the first 25 years of being

close to my dad, but the next 15 were phenomenal until he passed. What I took away from that conversation with Paul was that

the sooner a gay child can speak honestly with their parents, the quicker the family can move forward

with a more honest and hopefully loving relationship. So when 52-year-old Pat called asking if it was finally time to tell her elderly father

that she was gay, and in a loving relationship, my answer was definitely yes.

Pat, welcome to the program.

Thank you, Donna Laura, for taking my call.

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