It's reductive to say there are two kinds of people in the world, but I'm going to go

ahead and say it.

There are two kinds of Americans in the world.

The ones who've had a mall in their life and the ones who haven't.

I'm in the second category, but hearing people talk about their mall almost makes me wish

I weren't.

I once, you know, like, fit of rage as a tween, was like, I'm going with them all and

walked there.

And that was like the wildest thing I'd ever done, right?

I remember buying my first and last, I think, actually white leather belt because I felt

like I had to have that to go with like black jeans or something.

I would not do that now.

I remember going to Mrs. Fields Cookies, actually that's where I learned that Tupac Shakur

had died while it's like waiting in line for chocolate cookies.

There's a store called Kaby Toys.

There's one time it was going out of business and they had all these canes and wooden swords,

all these random fake weapons.

And we're like, let's spy.

It's hon of them.

Get a group of 20 friends together and have a duel and we did that.

So my mall was Northgate Mall in Durham, North Carolina, which is no more.

What is the mall where I shop for my chore coat at Sears, which was kind of an important

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