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This is NPR's Life Kit and I'm Sarah McCammon.

Some people are born knowing they want to be parents. Others are sure they

never do. But for a lot of folks, knowing when it's the right time to have a baby and if it's even the

right thing for your life, is a tough decision. I know I love kids. I just don't know if I want to do the 24-7

of parenthood. There's no return policy on kids.

I didn't want to be too old to have an active lifestyle with my kids. So like I want to be

able to play sports with them or, you know, go snowboarding or do that.

Back to the, I don't really know. Like I think that I do want kids, but I don't know if I want kids in this world.

Ultimately, when I reach all of those goals, then that would be a time where I know I can start pursuing adoption or creating a family.

And it's just like, well, you know, what if that's not what I want? You know, what if I don't want to have that?

I wasn't the kind of woman who always wanted to be a mom or who imagined a giant family,

but it just seemed like something everyone else did when you got married. So I did too.

There are so many things to think about when you're thinking about when and whether to become a parent,

and that can create this sense of tension that can be really difficult to untangle.

We can't untangle it for you, but in this episode of Life Kit,

we're going to talk about a few of the factors that shape that decision and suggest a plan for resolving some of the

tension.

Support for NPR and the following message comes from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation.

RWJF is a national philanthropy,

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