Hello, I'm Father Joe Roche of the Marian Fathers of the Immaculate Conception.

Thank you for joining us as we continue with our year-long journey,

reading the diary of St. Maria Faustina Kavalska from beginning to end.

Today, we take up from where we left off, beginning with Diary Entry Number 68. the heaviest suffering for me was that it

seemed to me that neither my prayers nor my good works were pleasing to God I did not

dare lift up my eyes to heaven this caused me such great suffering during the

community exercises in the chapel

that one day Mother Superior, Raphael, called me aside after the exercises and said to me,

Sister, ask God for grace and consolation, because I can see for myself and the sisters keep telling me

that the very sight of you evokes

pity. I really do not know what to do with you, sister. I command you to stop tormenting

yourself for no reason. But all these conferences with Mother Superior brought me no relief,

nor did they clarify anything for me. Rather, even greater darkness hid God from me.

I looked for help in the confessional, but not even there did I find it. A saintly priest wanted

to help me, but I was so miserable that I couldn't even define my trouble, and that vexed

him, me even more.

A deathly sadness penetrated my soul to such an extent that I was unable to hide it,

and it was apparent to those around me.

I lost hope. The night was growing darker and darker.

The priest, to whom I went to confession, said to me, I see very special graces in your sister,

and I am not worried about you at all.

Why are you torturing yourself in this way?

...