Hey everybody, hey, hey, this is going to be the shortest opening in the history of the

Todd Glass show, but happy birthday and you're going to join the Todd Glass show already

in progress. Bye.

We didn't even bring the lime juice. Comes in, he's eating. He pours me stuff out of his

own glass into my glass to conserve. That was sad. Yes, he did. Did you see it? He poured

from his glass into my glass because he didn't want to spend the money on extra ice. That's

what it is. I'm telling you. I just came all the way through. There's my glass. I brought

up a bit of my slime and a fresh ice. It's a lemon. I knew if I'm going to give you a

new drink. The thing is I forgot the lime juice. I'm coming back. Sure, sure Todd. Anything

you guys can give him will help. You know, Todd is falling on tough times. The cutbacks.

Yes, I do. We're out of lime juice. Yes, cutbacks. I like I do. He used to be able to afford

better guests too. Long gone are the days of him having Scott Ackerman. Yeah, I'm better

musicians too. Didn't Sarah Silverman used to do this show? Good Lord, what happened to Todd?

I'll tell you. He's a talented guy, but he stopped doing that good bit about get on the plane.

George Carlin, we know what you're talking about. Get on the plane. Get in. Let's go back in time.

I love Todd's Comedy Central Presents. Do you ever see it? Yeah.

Anyway, he walks with the plant. He tells the story about when he was high. That was great.

I remember, way before I ever met Todd, I saw that and I was cracking up that whole Comedy Central

Presents half hour of Todd Glass. Yeah, it's so many good bits. The smoking. Remember,

the smoking, like, you know, my dad, when he, I'm due Todd, my dad, when he used to smoke.

Yeah, that kind of lower voice. Yeah, he used to smoke it. Look painful.

Look like he was in pain. You know, he'd do that face and he'd have a cigarette on stage.

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