In every area of life, whether we're talking about sex, parenting, money, vacations,

almost never will you have everyone operating on the same level of desire and the same direction.

So there will always be differences, and that's one of the core issues that evokes contempt.

Welcome to the Good Faith podcast. I'm your host, Curtis Chang. And the Good Faith podcast is where friends

who follow Jesus help each other make sense of the world. And one of the primary ways that we make

sense of the world is through marriage. Now, this is certainly true if you are currently married.

Something happens in the world.

My wife, Jody, is going to be the first person I turn to and say, can you believe this happened?

Or, you know, what do you think of this? But here's a truth that's often not acknowledged, that

even if you're not currently married, marriage still serves as a lens on the world for you. And this could be through a past

marriage you've had, or especially for all of us, it would be the marriage of our parents who shape

how we look at the world. And this is why I'm so glad to invite back onto the good faith

my good friend, Dan Allender.

Dan is a renowned therapist who's written numerous books on trauma, abuse, healing, love, forgiveness,

and he's recently written with co-author Stephen Hall, a wonderful book on marriage called The Deep Routed Marriage.

Dan, welcome back to the Good Faith podcast.

Thank you, Curtis.

It's, you know, this is one of those painful realities of I would just love to be with you

physically someday, let alone just digitally, but it's an honor to be with you.

Well, and when we get together, if I come to visit you, we'll play ping pong.

Right behind you is a ping pong table. That would be fun to do so. All right, Dan, let's get

into it. You've written a book on marriage, and I've just made the point that marriage shapes

...