Welcome to episode 449 with my guest, Tony M. I'm Paul Gilmartons, the

Mental Illness Happy Hour, a place for honesty about all the battles in our heads,

from medically diagnosed conditions, past traumas, and sexual dysfunction,

to everyday compulsive negative thinking. This show's not meant to be a

substitute for professional mental counseling. I'm not a therapist that's not a

doctor's office. It's more like a waiting room that doesn't suck. The website

for this show is mentalpod.com, mental pod, also the social media handles. You can

follow us at. I want to, first of all, an update on the ketamine infusions that

I did. I did five of them and I'm not sure it helped me. That's one of the things my

psychiatrist he said. He said, you know, it's worth looking into, but I have the

feeling it's not that's not going to make a difference because you have

treatment resistant depression. And then he laughed and tried to high-five me and I

told him to fuck off. But there's also a lot of other moving parts going on right

now. I'm weaning myself off lmectal, so that might be affecting things. In the last

week, I had an epic sugar binge that threw me into a deep, deep funk. And I don't

know how much that is contributing to it, but I backed off of the sugar and the carbs the

last couple of days and I'm feeling significantly better. So it's one of the frustrating things

about battling any type of metal thing is just knowing what what part is fucking with me right

now. What part do I need to adjust? What? It's so it's some days it's so overwhelming.

It's so overwhelming. I want to read an awful some moment. This is filled out by

a woman who calls herself full of myself, but still hungry. Such a great name. She writes,

a few years ago when I was 23, I was at a bar in my city, grabbing drinks with my friend.

...