Hey, everyone, before we begin, I just want to remind you to please check out my new

No Bad Kids Master course.

You can find out all about it at nobadkidscourse.com Hi, this is Janet Lansbury.

Welcome to Unreffelt.

Today I'm going to be talking about consequences, threats, punishments, how these

apply to a respectful, effective, disciplined approach, if they do it all.

And how can we be certain whether we're doing one or another?

For instance, most of us listening here, I think, know that punishments aren't helpful,

but is a consequence, actually a punishment, or is a consequence actually a threat?

How do we navigate this?

Okay, so I'm going to start by reading an email I received from a parent.

For clarity, this is a two-mom family.

Hi, Janet.

First time caller, longtime listener, so to speak.

My question has to do with understanding the difference or nuance between using a threat

and an explanation of natural consequences with a three-year-old.

I understand generally why disconnected threats aren't great to throw around when you're

trying to, quote, get your child to do something, like get out the door to go to school, get

in the stroller to go home from the playground, etc.

But how about explanations of natural, time-bound consequences used as a reminder and

positive as a choice to your child when they aren't being cooperative or participatory?

For example, Mama has to leave the house by 715 tonight.

...