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Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I-Hart Radio. Good morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's tip is that clear is kind. Don't convince yourself that it is

nice to be vague or avoid giving feedback. Often, the most generous thing we can do is to tell the

truth directly. So we have probably all been in a situation when a person with

spinach stuck in her teeth keeps chatting and smiling with the nice people who pretend

not to notice the spinach. We all justify our silence by telling ourselves we don't want to

embarrass her, by telling her it's there.

And maybe that is fine at a party, but sometimes the feedback is more serious than a little spinach in the teeth.

Maybe you've got a colleague who talks too much in meetings and has a tendency to ramble, but no one coaches him on that because no one wants to hurt his feelings. Or maybe someone sends emails that are way too informal for your industry. And your manager has brought up the issue,

but in a vague way that doesn't get the message across. You know, some blanket statement in a meeting

that we all need to work on clear communication.

Really? Your colleague comes away thinking, yes, I am clear, and everyone likes my friendliness and effusiveness.

Not knowing people are cringing through every message. We might tell ourselves we are not direct

because we want to spare the other person's feelings.

But if the feedback wouldn't be delivered in a hurtful or humiliating way,

then in truth, the actual motivation is to spare awkwardness for ourselves.

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