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When Elon Musk tested his new mic on Twitter, the end result had him all a glitter.

But just when Ron was set to come on, it sounded like the whole thing went down the shitter.

Transgender children's kids underwear is a waste of money.

I can't even get my kids to suck their shirt tilts it.

Mr. and Mr. Pete Buttigieg are going to have a cook out this weekend.

They're going to have wemas, hamburgers, and bony francs.

After I left office in 2016, my audition for a remake of Mr. Rogers' name rod,

I don't understand why they said there was a significant reason I didn't get the bar.

After listening to AOC's comments about the government having to cut money because of the lousy Republicans,

I'm convinced her name must be Asunae Nakasio Cortez.

And every time she opens her mouth, she lowers the IQ of everyone within earshot by a hundred points.

Sitting on the dock of the space station, watching the earth spin around.

Woo! Sitting on the dock of the space station, wasting time.

That was your last jump line message.

Thank you for calling How We Car. You'd jump.

Chop Chumps was brought to you by our cheap bastard deals.

Go to HowWeCarsShow.com and click on store to get half priced gift cards for everything from restaurants to breweries to spas.

The deals are endless and they are cheap.

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