Chop Chumps is brought to you by our cheap bastard deals.

Go to Howie Cars Show.com and click on store to get half-priced gift cards for everything from

restaurants to breweries to spas.

The deals are endless and they are cheap.

The deals are endless.

And they are cheap. I was not checked up on prescription jugs during the state of the onion speech and I did not scream for the whole two hours.

Some of the time I whispered.

Did you hear Michael Cohen was suicidal and he went up on the roof of the Regency Hotel and threatened to kill himself?

But Joe Biden saved him by yelling, don't jump.

Joe Biden is going to receive an honorary degree from Howard University because I guess when he played football there 40 years ago, he never finished his studies.

That latest congressional hearing must have our adversaries really quaken.

I know you are, but what am I?

He started it, did not, did too.

Michael Cohen is almost as believable and trustworthy as Joe Biden and vice versa too.

So Scotty Shepler, number one in the world,

gets bundled by a couple of Ovenzealous cops.

I didn't know the PGA championship was being played at Poncapog.

What an awesome cap bite in the house. I mean the hair extensions were getting pulled out

the phony fingernails were getting ripped off The false eyelashes were a flutter.

I bet there was even some sidewood head movement with a finger wagon. Yeah, I love a good cat fight.

That was your last jump line message.

Thank you for calling Howie Car.

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