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The Howie Carr Radio Network

Chopped Chumps - 4.24.26

The Howie Carr Radio Network

Howie Carr

Politics, Daily News, News, News Commentary

4.61.5K Ratings

🗓️ 24 April 2026

⏱️ 2 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Don’t miss our daily dose of laughter! Tune in every weekday at 5:00 PM to hear the funniest chumps submitted by you, our loyal listeners. Want to be featured? Send us your best one-liners between noon and 4 PM at 844-500-4242. We can’t wait to hear from you!  Visit the Howie Carr Radio Network website to access columns, podcasts, and other exclusive content.

Transcript

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0:00.0

Chop Chumps is brought to you by our cheap bastard deals.

0:03.0

Go to howiecar show.com and click on store to get half-priced gift cards for everything from restaurants to breweries to spas.

0:10.1

The deals are endless, and they are cheap.

0:29.2

Hi. Howie, don't you think the straight of Hormus is a little crooked?

0:36.6

There once was a man named Brable, whose dalliances with the ladies was very able.

0:45.4

Much to his chagrin with his hands on its chin, he said, I wish this was a fable.

0:51.8

Howie, I'm the successful token caller.

0:55.0

I successfully never worked. I successfully never moved out of my parents' house.

0:59.0

And I successfully, uh, I forget.

1:05.0

When Belichette was asked to comment on Brable, he said,

1:09.0

for crying out loud, she's not even young enough to be his daughter.

1:12.6

We've had SpyGate and we've had these white gate.

1:15.6

What's this one called? How about Zipper Gate?

1:18.6

But that's what he did. He got it stuck in it.

1:21.6

I came up with a really great argument for recreational marijuana,

1:25.6

but I can't remember what it was.

1:28.9

Representative Omar, can you explain how you went from $30 million to $90,000 net worth?

1:36.7

Some accounting did something?

1:40.7

That was your last chump line message.

1:43.5

Thank you for calling Howie Car.

1:45.2

You chump.

1:46.6

Chop Chumps was brought to you by our cheap bastard deals.

...

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