Chop Chumps is brought to you by our cheap bastard deals.

Go to Howie Cars Show.com and click on store to get half-priced gift cards for everything from

restaurants to breweries to spas.

The deals are endless and they are cheap.

The deals are endless. satire is what you do to great people like Trump.

Weirdicue is what you do to buffoons like Brandon.

And if you don't think that Joe Biden can play basketball after eating a chocolate chip ice cream cone you should see him trouble.

Mercy, is this the end of poor Rico Biden?

No, it ain't so.

After hearing for years that the United States Constitution is a living document,

Elon Omar claims it's been reincarnated as the Somali constitution.

When my son died in France, in World War I, they named it the Battle of Bow Biden Wood. My professor, I won't get into my professor, but look, my predecessor, Donald Hump, called them suckers and losers.

How dare he say that?

I'm so excited that Taylor Swift, I mean the Kansas Sea Chiefs,

won the AFC Championship last night. Hopefully Taylor Swift, I mean the

Kansas City Chiefs will do good in the Super Bowl too.

Wow, the protest of the soup Nazis or were they the soup nutsees?

Sorry, but Utah says if you still have your stuff

that just saying you're a woman isn't enough.

If you stand to piss, then you ain't a mess.

So stay out of the ladies room.

Is that so tough?

...