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The One You Feed

Choosing Love in a Divisive World: Empathy as Our Guiding Light with Scott Stabile

The One You Feed

Eric Zimmer, The One You Feed

Education, Self-improvement, Religion & Spirituality, Health & Fitness, Buddhism, Mental Health

4.6 • 2.5K Ratings

🗓️ 26 September 2025

⏱️ 44 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this episode, Scott Stabile explores the idea of choosing love in a divisive world and how empathy can be our guiding light when life feels fractured. Scott shares deeply personal stories — from the tragedy of losing his parents to addiction in his family — and how forgiveness and compassion became the most difficult, yet most healing choices of his life. He talks about the role of awareness, the lies of shame, the futility of chasing quick fixes, and why love isn’t a fleeting feeling but an action we can commit to again and again. 

Key Takeaways:

  • The transformative power of love as a conscious choice.
  • The parable of the two wolves and the importance of feeding the good impulses.
  • The role of awareness and compassion in personal growth.
  • The impact of shame and the healing power of sharing personal struggles.
  • The relationship between forgiveness, empathy, and personal healing.
  • The complexities of addiction and its multifaceted nature.
  • The distinction between happiness as a feeling versus actions that promote happiness.
  • The management of fear through consistent action and self-care.
  • The futility of seeking a single solution to emotional struggles.
  • The importance of ongoing personal growth and the acceptance of emotional impermanence.


If you enjoyed this conversation with Scott Stabile, check out these other episodes:

How to Be Enough As You Are with Scott Stabile

Omid Safi on Radical Love

For full show notes, click here!

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

When we're really taking care of ourselves and looking after ourselves, we tend to be much more

0:05.7

caring in the way that we treat others.

0:15.7

Welcome to the one you feed. Throughout time, great thinkers have recognized the importance of the thoughts we have.

0:22.6

Quotes like garbage in, garbage out, or you are what you think, ring true. And yet, for many of us,

0:29.6

our thoughts don't strengthen or empower us. We tend toward negativity, self-pity, jealousy, or fear.

0:37.1

We see what we don't have instead of what we do.

0:40.0

We think things that hold us back and dampen our spirit. But it's not just about thinking.

0:45.4

Our actions matter. It takes conscious, consistent, and creative effort to make a life worth living.

0:51.8

This podcast is about how other people keep themselves moving in the right

0:55.2

direction, how they feed their good wolf. First off, Scott Stabil is one of my favorite

1:03.3

people. And when he talks about love, he isn't talking about rainbows and easy feelings. He's talking

1:08.7

about the hardest choice he ever made to forgive the man who

1:12.4

murdered his parents. Not because what happened was forgivable, but because he realized carrying

1:18.2

hatred was destroying him. That's the kind of love Scott writes about in big love, the power

1:24.5

of living with a wide open heart. It's about a love that's not sentimental,

1:28.8

but fierce, a love that asks us, even in our darkest moments, to choose connection over separation,

1:35.3

empathy over rage. Today, we talk about how that kind of love transforms us. I'm Eric Zimmer,

1:41.9

and this is the one you feed.

1:48.8

Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial at audible.co.uk.uk slash Wondery. That's audible.combe.ukes slash wondering.

1:55.9

Hi, Scott. Welcome to the show. Hey, Eric. Thanks for having me. Yeah, I'm excited to talk with you.

2:00.2

You've got a book

2:00.8

coming out soon called Big Love, The Power of Living with a Wide Open Heart, and we'll get

...

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