Chapter 19: The Authors of The Gospels, featuring Craig Cackowski, Mark Gagliardi, Hal Lublin and Matt Gourley

The Dead Authors Podcast

Paul F. Tompkins

Arts, Conan, Andy, Snl, Machine, Tompkins, 826, Daly, Maya, Books, Time, Tompkast, Travel, Ucb, Mcsweeneys, Rudolph, Superego, Comedy

4.9 • 1.6K Ratings

🗓️ 24 December 2012

⏱️ 53 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Chapter 19: Celebrate the birth of Christ with the men who wrote the books on Him! H.G. Wells (Paul F. Tompkins) welcomes his most... well, his most guests ever, in the personages of Saints Matthew, Mark, Luke and John (Craig Cackowski, Mark Gagliardi, Hal Lublin and Matt Gourley). And ye shall share it as The Greatest Podcast Ever Downloaded!

Transcript

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0:00.0	This Podcast is intended as Entertainment for Grownups and to spread awareness of 826 LA, a non-profit writing and tutoring center for children ages 6 to 18. For a full schedule of 826 LA's events and programs, including the Echo Park Time Travel Mart, visit 826.org.
0:16.4	And now here is the host of the Dead Authors Podcast, Mr. H.G. Wells. Seasons, G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. Welles.
0:27.0	Season's greetings and welcome to the Dead Authors Podcast. I'm your host, H.G. Wells, and I am delighted to report that it's that time of year again.
0:33.0	Christmas is upon us once more.
0:35.0	I know, I know.
0:36.0	You're probably a bit surprised that a man of science such as myself
0:40.0	could be swept up in all this holiday folder all, but dash it all, I can't help it.
0:45.4	Something about the nip in the air, the rosy glow in a child's cheek, and the fading memory
0:50.0	of Black Friday tramplings puts me in a mood that could only be described as Holly
0:54.4	Jolly. In fact, so full was I of Christmas cheer and rhymes that I decided to pop back in time and
1:01.6	scoop up the poet Clement Clark Moore, the author of, t'was the night before Christmas.
1:07.0	Well, when I got there, it was late in the evening of December 24th, and the Moore home was remarkably still, incredibly, even the house's multitudinous vermin
1:16.9	had ceased all movement. I crept past a few stockings dangling precisely from the
1:21.6	half in anticipation of Santa's imminent arrival
1:24.1	and was careful not to disturb the sleeping forms of Moore's progeny who were clearly
1:28.8	dreaming of some kind of bizarre candied fruit. I found Moore and his wife in their bedchamber, where, judging by
1:35.2	their manner of dress, they had only just retired for the night. But before I could get a word
1:40.0	out, there was a great cacophony from the front yard.
1:43.0	More leapt up to investigate and began an oddly complicated process of window opening.
1:48.0	At last, the source of the commotion was revealed, plain as day on the snowy grass.
1:53.2	It was a small sledge, to which was harnessed a pack of little reindeer.
1:58.0	I was far too gob-smacked to count, but if forced to guess,
	...

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