Hi everybody. So today's Coaches Corner is on people pleasing. A few questions for you.

Are you concerned about what other people think of you? Do you often make decisions based on what you

think will please others? Does your sense of self-worth come from the approval of

others? Do you often withhold from sharing what you truly want, think, or feel

because of fear it may upset someone?

And are you often last on your list of priorities?

Or definitely not first.

Believe me, you're not alone.

Our egos like to be liked, approved, and validated.

It's natural to want to fit in and not upset others because it feels safer.

All it takes is one small experience of feeling criticized, not liked, thinking we've upset someone

or getting tons of praise and validation for making others happy to develop people pleasing as a bad habit.

People pleasing is a terrible investment because it depletes your most valuable resources, your time and energy.

Just think about how much energy you waste by obsessing about what other people think of you or trying to strategize your actions to appease others.

Now I want to clarify, I am all for being a kind and considerate and generous person.

And it feels wonderful to love others.

But being and acting from love is not people pleasing.

People pleasing is different because there is an attachment to someone else's reaction

and or a motivation to please in order to avoid an undesired negative response or judgment or get a positive one.

Now you may be thinking being people pleaser makes you a quote unquote good person and is perhaps even a generous or loving way to be.

Actually not, it's selfish to be a people pleaser.

Why?

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