Care and Feeding | Slate's parenting show - When Does Pushing Kids to Succeed Become Toxic?

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3.8 • 546 Ratings

🗓️ 21 September 2023

⏱️ 31 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

On this episode: Zak Rosen, Jamilah Lemieux, and Elizabeth Newcamp talk about toxic achievement culture.

The three of them talk with Jennifer Breheny Wallace, journalist and author of Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic – And What We Can Do About It — about how we push our kids, and ourselves, even when we don’t need to.

We also go over our week in parenting. And then, for Slate Plus, we’ll debrief on our conversation with Jennifer, and the hosts will discuss how they, and their kids, fall victim to toxic achievement culture.

Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Mom and Dad are Fighting. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Maura Currie.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This episode may contain explicit language.
0:05.4	Welcome to Mom and Dad are Fighting, Slate's Parenting Podcast for Thursday, September 21st, the Toxic Achievement Edition.
0:13.1	I'm Jemila Lemieux, a writer, contributor to Slate's Karen feeding parenting column, and mom to Naima, who's 10, and we live in Los Angeles.
0:37.8	I'm Elizabeth Newkamp. I write the homeschool and family travel blog Dutch Dutch goose. I'm the mom of three littles, Henry who's 11, Oliver who's nine, and Teddy who's six. We live in Tokyo, Japan. I'm Zach Rosen. I make a different podcast. It's called The Best Advice Show. And I'm Dad Tenoa, who's six, and Ami, who's three.
0:42.6	We live in Detroit. Today on the show, we're going to be joined by Jennifer Brinney Wallace,
0:48.1	author of Never Enough, when achievement culture becomes toxic and what we can do about it.
0:53.6	She'll tell us how to help our kids aim high, but also how to help them love themselves no matter what. But before that, we're going to
0:55.7	share some stories from our weekend parenting. And then, if you're in the Slate Plus Club,
1:01.1	we'll be debriefing our interview with Jennifer and talking about our own experiences with
1:04.8	achievement culture. Here's a peak of what you'll hear if you have Slate Plus. Jenny talked about
1:10.2	like this kind of false life vest that a lot of parents put on
1:15.0	getting into a good college and that it's like actually a leaded vest.
1:18.5	Like what do you think is the kind of philosophical alternative to doing everything you can
1:23.2	to get your kids into a good school?
1:24.7	Like, what are your priorities?
1:26.2	I mean, I think what I want is for them
1:27.8	to find what makes them happy, right? Because I know a lot of adults who pursued things for status,
1:37.1	and they are unhappy now. What makes the kids happy? What is going to motivate them to want to get up and do their job?
1:46.2	And that is in the back of my head, but I also feel like I am fighting a childhood where success was
1:53.7	important. By becoming a Slate Plus member, you'll enjoy a weekly bonus segment and all your
2:00.1	beloved Slate podcast without any advertisements.
2:03.4	It's the ultimate way to enhance your listening experience while also providing vital support to the show.
	...

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