Canadian Couple Leaves Mormon Church - Ben and Justine Jalaff Pt. 2 | Ep. 2015
Mormon Stories Podcast
Dr. John Dehlin
4.6 • 5.2K Ratings
🗓️ 1 May 2025
⏱️ 186 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this powerful continuation of our interview with Ben and Justine, we explore their raw and honest journey from deep devotion in the LDS Church to personal awakening, heartbreak, and healing.
They share how their relationship grew during Justine’s school years, navigating early marriage, financial and gender-role challenges, and the burden of trying to live up to faith-based ideals. From motherhood identity struggles to confronting doctrinal issues and discovering their voices during a faith crisis, this episode is full of vulnerable, eye-opening moments.
Highlights include:
Gender roles & pressure in Mormonism
The cost of silence during a faith crisis
The CES Letter, LDS Discussions & uncovering hard truths
Healing from betrayal, rebuilding marriage & reconnecting with family
Their plea for empathy from believing members
Whether you're in faith, out of faith, or somewhere in between—this is a story about agency, partnership, and finding truth together.
Watch this episode on YouTube here.
___________________
At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.
Our overall mission is to:
- Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology
- Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis
- Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I know that you have lied now. |
| 0:03.5 | There's no mental gymnastics for me. |
| 0:05.2 | For me, it's just like, no, no, no. |
| 0:07.5 | You lie. |
| 0:08.6 | It's over. |
| 0:09.9 | I serve a mission. |
| 0:10.7 | I didn't teach this. |
| 0:12.3 | I didn't teach it. |
| 0:13.5 | The church made you a liar. |
| 0:14.8 | I went and lie. |
| 0:17.4 | When Ben told me that he was walking away from the church, |
| 0:25.6 | I knew at that moment that I was losing my privilege in the church. My privilege is through my priesthood holder. |
| 0:29.6 | Because as a woman in the church, I do not have the priesthood. |
| 0:33.6 | And then I'll be that lady sitting in the ward where everyone's going to talk about her and ward counsel and say, |
| 0:40.5 | what can we do to support this woman with the priesthood? |
| 0:45.4 | Because her husband has left the covenant path. |
| 0:48.8 | And I knew in that moment, that is not going to be my reality in the church. |
| 0:55.4 | For me, I couldn't be a patriarch. |
| 0:58.5 | It just almost felt like an abusive role to me. |
| 1:02.5 | It wasn't in my DNA to be like that. |
| 1:05.1 | She's expecting me to lead the household when I have no experience whatsoever how to do this. I internalize this messaging of prosperity gospel very hard, |
| 1:16.6 | that it's this transaction that if you do all the spiritual things, |
... |
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