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Can You Don't?

Can You Don't? | Putin. Music Bingo. Nest. Pencil Party.

Can You Don't?

Joe Paisley and Bryan Albrandt

Scared To Death, Insane People, Is We Dumb, Bryan Albrandt, Comedy Podcast, Sexual Fantasy, Funniest, Bad Magic Productions, New, Arts, Stupid Criminals, Funny, Improv, Tiktok, Paisley Productions, Comedy, Trending, Viral Videos, Dan Cummins, Timesuck, Insane, Joe Paisley, Can You Dont

4.61.1K Ratings

🗓️ 30 July 2025

⏱️ 89 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

We're not doctors by any means, but something tells us that muting a patient's vital signs because the beeping is interrupting your game of music bingo isn't a good idea. Let's talk about that, arresting a man in a wheelchair for kicking a door down, watching a girl rub herself while she's rubbing your poop all over her body, having sex with Putin, and more on today's episode of Can You Don't?!


*** Wanna become part of The Gaggle and access all the extra content on the end of each episode PLUS tons more?! Our Patreon page is LIVE! This is the biggest way you can support the show. It would mean the world to us: http://www.patreon.com/canyoudontpodcast ***


New Episodes every Wednesday at 12pm PST


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Official Website: http://canyoudontpodcast.com


Custom Music Beds by Zach Cohen


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Can You Don't?

PO Box 1062

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Putin. Music bingo. Nest. Pencil party.

0:05.0

Hey, we both have hats. You look good in that hat. It looks too small for your head, though. Well, careful, you might fly away. Oh, I spin the old propeller cap. Just fly through the roof. Too fast, and then before you know, you're just here by yourself. And it's just, the walls walls the ceiling's crumbling in i'm sitting here like

0:37.8

what the hell oh man how am i what am i going to do how am i going to read all this i the contrast

0:43.2

of you and that had in your mustache oh yeah so the people aren't seeing joe has a mustache now

0:47.7

you came to the dark side i did so uh there was a birthday party last week and for no reason

0:53.8

out of nowhere uh we were sitting around eating dinner and Pepper's like, you haven't shaved your beard off in a long time. And I was like, let's do it. Because my face looks fat. Yeah, just being, just being fun. So I went and shaved a mustache and now we both have like the mustache but also like a little more than a five o'clock shadow coming back.

1:11.3

A little scruff underneath there.

1:12.3

Just if I go straight to the skin, my face looks so fat.

1:16.0

Just having that little five o'clock shadow adds a little definition to it.

1:19.6

A little depth.

1:20.5

It looks like my neck goes straight into my chin if I don't have it.

1:24.5

Well, people already thought we looked a lot of like and now we're doing this. So fuck us, huh? Episode 163. Not a fun number. It feels like a bobby here, but it feels like a big day. It is a big day. Yeah. Sign up for Patreon and oh my God, you sons of bitches. Did they ever? What a fun week it has been at Camp Can You Don't. Of course,

1:46.2

the Honkathon is on. As we record this, we are well past the 400 subscriber mark. So,

1:54.5

we're in talks right now. We're figuring it all out. Brian and I are going to get that silly goose

2:00.7

tattoo. Okay. So as you know, if you've done tattoos, you just have to iron all the details and figure out what's going on. But that is in the works right now. We're not going to tell you guys what it is. It's going to be a surprise. But we do know that Brian and I are both getting the same tattoo. And we're very excited about it. It's going to be fun. Yes. So thank you guys so much, whatever tier you have signed up to on patreon.com slash can you know podcast. Thank you so much. But it's continuing on 425. Brian's going to get his ice checks, 450, hot air balloon, balloon. And we were just talking about the fucking eyes test.

2:36.2

I'm like, how do we get my eyes test? I don't know. I'll figure it out. I mean, you're the guy with glasses. You've obviously done it before. Yeah, so my insight is, it's easy. You just call them and say, hey, my eyes need a test. That was your answer. I was like, how do I, what do I do?

2:31.4

You're like, you just call and get them checked.

2:33.1

I'm like, yeah, just go in there and get your eyes tested.

2:34.8

Never done it before.

2:35.6

They will gladly take your money.

2:37.1

Just go get your eyes test. My eyesight has been exquisite up until this point. So, I don't know about that. 475, Zach has its own camera and then 500 subscribers on Patreon, part of the gaggle.

3:09.6

500 strong! That's how we get that extra Patreon episode every single month.

...

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