Breaking Generational Trauma to Become a Present Father featuring Adam Schafer
The Dad Edge Podcast
Larry Hagner
4.8 • 1.6K Ratings
🗓️ 21 November 2025
⏱️ 76 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this episode of the Dad Edge Podcast, I sit down with Adam Schafer, co-host of the popular Mind Pump Podcast, for a vulnerable, authentic, and deeply reflective conversation on fatherhood, healing generational trauma, and building connection through presence—not performance. Adam opens up about his own childhood trauma, how it shaped his identity, and the intentional work he's done to break the cycle and show up differently for his son.
We dive into the power of emotional safety, why performance-based love doesn't work, and the simple but powerful practice of being fully present. Whether you're a father looking to lead with more empathy or a man learning to love from a healed place, this conversation will resonate deeply.
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS
[0:00] – Introduction
[2:07] – Adam reflects on his father's absence and the pain of unfulfilled promises
[5:45] – How unresolved trauma shaped his early identity and choices
[8:10] – The pivotal moment he realized his success was masking deeper wounds
[11:28] – Why he decided to show up differently for his son
[14:42] – The importance of building emotional safety, not just structure
[17:36] – Why "being there" is different from being present
[20:03] – Teaching through modeling instead of controlling
[22:14] – Using breathwork, journaling, and awareness to stay grounded
[25:11] – Why your kids don't need perfection—they need you
[28:55] – Adam's approach to leading with grace and empathy at home
[31:30] – Navigating self-doubt and letting go of old patterns
[35:07] – Final reflections: leading with love, not ego
5 KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Unresolved Trauma Shows Up in Fatherhood: Adam shares how his unprocessed childhood pain impacted how he first approached success, relationships, and parenting—until he consciously chose to heal and grow.
- Presence Is More Than Proximity: Simply being around isn't enough. Kids need engaged, emotionally available fathers who are attuned to their needs.
- Breaking Generational Patterns Starts With Awareness: Adam emphasizes that healing begins when we're honest about what shaped us—and we choose to respond differently moving forward.
- Your Kids Need Safe, Not Perfect: It's not about being the perfect dad. It's about being the one your kids feel emotionally safe with—where they can be seen, heard, and loved unconditionally.
- You Can't Teach What You Don't Practice: Breathwork, journaling, emotional regulation—Adam models these daily so he can parent from a grounded and connected place.
LINKS & RESOURCES
- Connect with Adam Schafer and Mind Pump Media: https://mindpumppodcast.com
- Download the Questions for the Car resource: https://thedadedge.com/25questions
- Explore more episodes and resources: https://thedadedge.com/podcast
- thedadedge.com/soulmates
- Podcast Shownotes: https://thedadedge.com/1404
If this episode helped you reflect, reframe, or reconnect, don't forget to rate, review, and share the podcast. One conversation can change everything.
Live legendary.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Dad Edge podcast. The Dad Edge movement creates leaders of men, leaders of families, and leaders of communities. We will not only impact this generation of fathers, but the next generation as well. The kids we are raising will have better chances and odds stacked in their favor because of the amazing example |
| 0:21.2 | that their fathers emulated for them. We are here to change the world. We are here to change |
| 0:27.6 | relationships. We are here to positively disrupt this generation of fathers so no man goes to their |
| 0:33.6 | grave with regret. We disrupt the drift of busyness and replace it with razor-focused intention, |
| 0:40.3 | passion, purpose, and direction. |
| 0:43.7 | We are the Dad Edge, |
| 0:45.7 | and we're here to change the game. |
| 0:47.8 | We're here to change the game. |
| 1:08.0 | I don't know. What's going on, gentlemen, welcome to the Dad Edge podcast. I'm Larry Hagner, your host and founder of this podcast, this show, and movement. |
| 1:12.7 | Opening question for you guys, what kind of father do you think you would be if your own father tragically, sadly, and abruptly ended his own life at the tender |
| 1:22.1 | age of seven? Because that is the experience of my guest today, Adam Schaefer, who is one of three men who |
| 1:30.2 | host the podcast and the platform that is forever popular, in my opinion, one of the OGs |
| 1:37.8 | in the fitness space, a man who's been podcasting for 15 plus years in this space and has a knowledge of fitness |
| 1:45.7 | and fatherhood and family like nobody's business. And that is Adam Schaefer. Adam and I, |
| 1:52.0 | we actually go way back. We go back six years. I was invited to go on mind pump podcast back in |
| 1:59.2 | 2019 to talk about the dad Edge. And I was invited by those three |
| 2:05.6 | guys and I was honored. And out of that connection with Justin, Sal, and Adam, shockingly, |
| 2:13.8 | Adam and I became really close and became really good friends. |
| 2:28.8 | And it was because, to be honest, when I first met Adam, when I shook his hand and just started to get to know him a little bit, I thought out of those three guys I would have the least in common with him, to be honest. |
| 2:37.0 | And then he started to share his story about how his father took his own life at seven years old. And he came on the podcast back in 2019 on my show. And we've been friends ever since. And I pinged at him. |
| 2:43.5 | It was about three months ago. And I said, hey, I've got a new book coming out called Pursuit of Legendary |
| 2:47.6 | Fatherhood. I'd love to come on Mind Pump again. So I traveled out to California this past month and was on his show. And then I interviewed him. And I got to tell you, |
... |
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