I moved here because, well, I had to leave the States, but I picked Thailand because I always had a thing for Asian girls, you know?

And when I got here, oh, I was like a kid in a candy store.

If you have money, no attachments, nothing to do, I started partying.

It got wild. I was picking up girls every night, always different

ones, petite ones, chubby ones, older ones, sometimes multiple ladies at night. I was out of

control. I became insatiable and, you know, after about a thousand nights like that you start to lose it i started

to wonder where am i going with this why do i feel this need to fuck all these women what is desire

the form of this cute asian girl why does it have such a grip on me? Because she's the opposite of me?

Is she going to complete me in some way?

I realized I could fuck a million women.

I'd still never be satisfied.

Maybe what I really want is to be one of these Asian girls.

So one night I took home some girl who turned out to be a

lady boy, which I'd done before, but this time instead of fucking the lady boy, the lady boy fucked me.

And it was kind of magical. And it got in my head when I really wanted it was to be one of those Asian girls getting fucked by me

and to feel that. So I put out an ad looking for a white guy my age to come over and fuck me.

Got a guy that looked a lot like me. Then I put on some lingerie and perfume, made myself look

like one of those girls. I thought, I looked pretty hot.

And then this guy came over and reeled the shit out of me.

Then I got addicted to that.

Some nights, three, four guys would come over and reel the shit out of me.

Some, I even had to pay.

...