Borderline Emails #1
Psychology In Seattle Podcast
Kirk Honda
4.5 • 1.3K Ratings
🗓️ 15 May 2026
⏱️ 76 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/KIRK to get 10% off your first month.
00:00 Is quiet borderline a term?13:29 Do personality disorders improve over time?
25:56 Does BPD present differently in different people?
36:12 What is the intersection of eating disorders and BPD?
1:01:20 Dr. Kirk's experience with BPD clients
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hey, Deserving listeners. So this morning I sat down to prepare to record an episode in which I responded to emails. |
| 0:08.0 | And so I was looking at a bunch of emails. And I realized that there were a bunch of emails about Borderline. |
| 0:13.4 | So I thought I would lump all those emails together. And there's hundreds of emails, maybe thousands. |
| 0:21.5 | And so I just did a search by borderline and BPD and looked them over to see if it made |
| 0:27.6 | sense to include them. |
| 0:29.0 | And I created a separate Google Doc with all those emails. |
| 0:32.6 | And I thought I would go through them for a variety of reasons all in one fell swoop. |
| 0:38.6 | One is that I must likely to repeat myself if I'm doing it all at once, |
| 0:44.4 | you know, instead of having an occasional borderline email throughout various different episodes. |
| 0:51.3 | Also, for the audience, if you're not interested in borderline, then you can skip this |
| 0:55.2 | episode. So let's get into it. My name is Dr. Kirkonda. I'm a therapist, a professor, and I specialize |
| 1:02.8 | in personality disorders and particularly borderline and narcissistic. So with the first question, annual patron Nicole, she says, |
| 1:13.7 | is quiet borderline an actual thing that is clinically recognized? I didn't realize BPD could |
| 1:22.2 | manifest differently than the classic way. End of email. Is Quiet Borderline an actual clinical thing? |
| 1:30.1 | And then she's like, I didn't realize that there were different types of borderline. |
| 1:33.9 | Okay. |
| 1:34.5 | So I've talked about this before, but to repeat myself very briefly, because there's a lot of emails, |
| 1:40.4 | is that Quiet Borderline is an informal term that has emerged online. |
| 1:45.6 | And in my opinion, it is fine, but also a little bit of a problem. |
| 1:53.0 | Basically, what's happening is that there's a lot of stigma about borderline that is false, |
| 1:58.3 | meaning that even among clinicians, they will talk about people with borderline in this very stigmatizing, otherizing, cartoonish way. |
| 2:07.6 | You know, some people with borderline can be highly problematic and can fit the stereotype of someone that is, you know, always a problem. They fight other people. They take people to |
... |
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