Ladies and gentlemen, we interrupt this news bulletin to bring you a program.

Our late show film presentation for this evening will be a revival featuring the late Leslie Howard as the Scarlett Pimple.

I'm sorry, I mean the Scarlett Pimple now.

Let's listen to this commercial for a self-service laundry.

Ladies who care to drive by and drop off their clothes will receive prompt detention.

I'm the Midwest is suffering from one of its worst wetters in history, with temperatures dropping to 22 degrees below zero.

Tomorrow's forecast is for continued mild.

You got a souvenir? I got a souvenir. What is it?

It's, uh, I don't know. It's a piece of demonstrators, uh, flag. It says peace and being armed, we won't fight.

You know what they're gonna do with it? You ever see a guy wipe his ass with it?

Tune in again tomorrow, same time, same station, to see if John will goose Sadie's cook.

That should read to see if John cooks Sadie's goose.

Even the most veteran performers sometimes burst into uncontrollable laughter when something strikes them funny,

as evidenced by Lowell Thomas' complete breakup while he was doing a newscast.

And the little girl deserves to know her mother, so she's a house and I think her mother deserves to know her.

Ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha-ha.

Well, I won't sell, it's all just saying you were um, ha-ha-ha.

So Harris, the man leader, she explains the work he's so hard all day at the film studio.

of diamonds, not in some pretty good humor. She snaps a puppy, which is all wrong.

He's the best of it for you, but the old tomorrow is the first of May.

Now, the old Thomas says, so long until tomorrow, this program came to you from New York.

And now we are going to hear a recording of Ritzky Korsikov's Bum of the Flightful B.

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