Big questions, bite-sized.

Short and curly bites.

Bites, bites, bites, bites, short and curly bites.

Big questions, small serving size.

Okay, so help that lady figure out which train she needed to catch.

That was very kind of me, yes.

Oh, put some coins in that collection tin.

Nice.

What else?

Oh, notice that my sister got a haircut and told her that it looked great,

even though it was just a trim.

Still counts. Hey, Carl. what's you doing? Oh,

you know, just tallying all the nice things I've done this week. Oh, okay. Why? Um,

for my kindness bonus, silly. Your kindness bonus? Yeah, you know, the payment you get from the government for being kind, the more kind things you do, the more money they give you.

I'm sorry, what are you talking about?

There's no such thing as a kindness bonus.

No one is paying people to be kind.

Yes, they are.

The Prime Minister made this big announcement about it, remember?

And he was a scarecrow, and he was wearing a hat made of beans, and everyone in the village cheered as they rode their purple donkeys round in circles. You know, as I say it out loud, I'm realizing this may have been a dream.

Yeah, sorry, buddy. Here in the awake world, we do kind things because it's the right thing to do,

not because someone's paying us.

...