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ladies and gentlemen

may i have your attention please

the show stops in five, four, three, six, one, one, go.

Good morning, class.

Say hello to Billy Madison.

Hello, Billy Madison.

You want me take my shirt off for you?

No, thank you.

Okay, baby.

Okay, baby. And good morning.

Welcome, Billy Madison's show.

Hello. You know a Nard has dropped like 40 pounds?

Yep.

Look at this skinny son of a bitch over there, this handsome son of a bitch over there. Look at him. Yep. He's lost like 40 pounds. I have. Since win. Since October? Since October. What is that? Since October? He can't really say it like that. I don't know. Why do you say it? Since October. Oh, okay. Hocked on October. It's like he turns off and then back on again. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's like he shuts down at the auger. Yeah. Just getting warmed up. Yeah. Look at that handsome skinny son of a bitch over there. Yeah, I mean, yeah.

What do you got to say for yourself, sir? I feel great. You have to. You've been on Ozmpic, huh? No, I haven't. No. What are you doing? Is it crap? No, I... Ozipic. Myth. No. What is it? No, it's literally, I've just been running and doing sauna. Yeah, have you seen that, like, that good RX commercial, you know, for, you know, pharmacies and stuff like that? And they got that, like, big fat girl in there. I have not seen this. And she's like, she's like, staring you down, like right in your eyes. And she's like, I got my O-ZPIC through good R-X, and then she, like,

stabs herself in the gut with the shot.

Oh, my gosh. They're basically just like, hey, O-ZIPA, good R-X, get it cheaper, you know? It was just like, oh, my God, that was an aggressive commercial. That is super aggressive. She's like having snacks at her desk, and she's like, I got my old Zepwick.

Boom! And then just stabs herself right in the gut. That's aggressive. Yeah. It worked though. I'm going to give it. My God, that was speaking to me. The only thing with that drug is that once you stop it, people say that they gain way more weight. Oh, you always talk about the negative. I'm just saying. You always got to bring it up the negative. Like Nard's doing it naturally. Yeah. Negative Billy. I don't know. Negative people are saying. Yeah. You gain back more weight. Hater. And you're even more poofy. Yeah, we'll just take more ozimic.

Well, people that need it, like... Give me double shots. Isn't it for diabetes or something? No, yeah, probably, but who cares? It's for weight loss. Yeah, now it's for weight loss. Right? Guess what all diabetes people need to do, lose weight. They do. Yeah. So boom, it's a two birds, one stone.

Or as Nor would say, two stones, one bird.

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