Big Dick Energy (w/ Conan O'Brien)

Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer

Headgum & Nicole Byer

Date, Comedy, Relationship, Single, Raya, Therapy, Dating, Couples, Hookups, Romance, Bumble, Dating Apps, Comedy Interviews, Love, Relationships, Nicole Byer, Health & Fitness, Sex, Advice, Encounters, Tinder, Interview, Sexuality, Podcast, Hookup, Stories, Interviews, Society & Culture

4.8 • 15.6K Ratings

🗓️ 15 January 2021

⏱️ 66 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Conan O'Brien is here to help solve the root problems behind Nicole's singledom. They also discuss his sexually repressed Catholic upbringing, what it's like to have Big Dick Energy, and his plans for his 20th wedding anniversary. Nicole demands to marry into the O'Brien family, explains to Conan how some of her vibrators work, and describes how she's now using a Theragun to masturbate. Support Black Lives Matter. For a list of resources and ways to help, check out blacklivesmatters.carrd.co. Follow Nicole Byer: Twitter: @nicolebyer Instagram: @nicolebyer Facebook: www.facebook.com/nicolebyercomedy

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Why won't you date me?
0:10.0	Why won't you date me?
0:12.0	Why won't you date me?
0:14.0	Please, tell me why.
0:18.0	Oh, baby, welcome to another episode of Why won't you date me?
0:27.0	A podcast for me, Nicole Byer tries to figure out how I'm still single, even though you could jerk off into my wallpaper glue and then I have to put my wallpaper up with your com!
0:38.0	My guest today, I'm not even gonna give him credits because he's so wonderful, he's so kind, he gave me my first late night interview and I'll forever be thankful and grateful.
0:49.0	It's Conan O'Brien!
0:54.0	Wow, that was an incredible intro except for the wallpaper glue part.
0:59.0	Ah, yeah, you didn't like that?
1:01.0	Well, I just, first of all, I don't think it would be a good adherent, I don't think it would really work as a wallpaper glue, so I think that's just a waste of man's most vital fluid.
1:12.0	So that's my only problem with that, you know?
1:15.0	Fair!
1:16.0	Yeah, sorry, sorry to start with a negative, but...
1:18.0	Hey, it's okay!
1:20.0	I'm not saying I've tried it, I'm not saying I've tried it, I use a regular wallpaper glue, I've never tried that other method.
1:27.0	But, do you have wallpaper in your home?
1:30.0	I don't have my wallpaper, any wallpaper in this home, in Los Angeles, but I had this little antique house in Connecticut, and years ago I put up some old wallpaper in one of the rooms to make it feel like it was a little antique room.
1:47.0	Ooh!
1:49.0	Yeah, yeah, this is why I'm thought of as asexual by everybody listening right now.
1:56.0	There was nothing about Conan O'Brien putting up antique wallpaper that's getting anybody hot and heavy.
2:01.0	I don't know, HGTV is a whole network dedicated to home decorating, and I know some people are getting off to the property brothers, house hunter renovations, Joanna and Chip, so I don't know.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Headgum & Nicole Byer, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Headgum & Nicole Byer and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.