Hi, I'm Willow Belden, and you're listening to Out There. This is a podcast about the outdoors, from your window box and garden to the fields on the edge of town, to the forests, prairies, seashores, and wilderness.

On the show, we explore our relationship with nature, through stories, interviews, essays, and even some fiction.

We travel around the U.S. and the world with tales of love and heartbreak,

passion and adversity, desperation, and triumph. This episode, we're going to switch things up a bit. Instead of inviting a guest onto the show, I'd like to share a story of my own.

It takes place in the desert in Utah, and it's about how something that initially seemed

like a failure turned out to be an emotional victory. I'd been feeling anxious and overworked for what seemed like ages.

I'd just launched this podcast, and even though it was exciting, the process had been pretty exhausting.

Work days were brutally long, and I hadn't had a weekend off in months.

So I was exhausted.

But the bigger thing that was bothering me, the thing that was really getting under my skin, was this.

I felt like I'd lost my spark, my passion, my drive, the excitement that had always defined

me. And so I planned to get away for a bit and join some friends on a trip to Puerto Rico. We were

going to sit on the beach, relax in the sun, do a little kayaking and snorkeling, and escape the lingering Wyoming winter.

I was so looking forward to this trip. I really needed it. But then I started thinking about what it

would cost. I went back and forth. Should I go? Should I not go? I knew it would be fun, but I really didn't have the money.

I'd been working insane hours getting this podcast off the ground, but it wasn't making me any money yet.

Quite the opposite.

And so, in the end, I bailed on the Puerto Rico trip.

But I had already cleared my schedule for the week, and as I said before, I really, really wanted

to get away.

I was... Moab. It had been on my bucket list for a while. If you've never been to Moab, it's a part of Utah that's brimming with majestic rock formations. You've probably seen the iconic picture of a bright red arch with a tiny person standing beneath.

There are two national parks in the area, arches and canyon lands, and endless miles of trails for hiking and mountain biking.

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