Folks, welcome to the bellied up podcast. We are here at Bernsies in West Dallas, Wisconsin,

and we met a bar patron here. Tommy. Hi, I'm Tom. Tom. Oh, you go by Tom. Well, Tommy's works, too,

but for the joke, it's got to be Tom. What joke? The 51st dates joke. The guy with the 10- second memory. Everybody knows it. Well, that's you. That's you, man. You know, you know, hello? So what are you doing? You're wearing a golf shirt? Are you going golfing today? I golfed at 7 a.m. this morning. Oh, one of those days. It was 46 degrees when we teed off. What kind of gig you got that you're going golfing that early in the morning and spend

all day at the board?

Semi retired.

What is that mean?

I'm waiting for a podcast where I can make some serious money, but it has a cup calling it.

You're on your way.

That's right.

Got to start somewhere.

As Tom slash Tommy was leaving the bar, he used me and Charlie's Catholic guilt against us to get on the podcast. He said, I'm leaving because you guys won't invite me on the podcast. So here I am. Look how that works. Well, is this your first time on a podcast? 100% yes. Well, all right. So you want to do a podcast for your retirement gig? What would your podcast be about golf? I think it would be about how, how terrible I am at relationships. Oh, and help guys that way. Okay. How many marriages? Yeah. Just one. Just watched. That was good. Since then, I got dumped this morning while I was golfing. You got dumped this morning, Tommy. Can you believe that? She texts me. We're done. Don't talk to me ever again. Actually? Is this a true story? I can show you the text message. Yeah, let's see the text message. Oh, man. Let's get this confirmed. This is going to be truthful. Oh, you got a whole story line here. She's sending paragraphs. Oh, my God.

And she's at works to send me all this. For, for, oh, I see a fucking in there. That's not good.

Fucking pathetic. Yes. Fucking bullshit. Not like I'm cheating. Yeah. Whoa. Is this you or her? This is her texting.

Oh, can I read it? Well, yeah, let's go back to the beginning.

Oh, God.

This is awesome.

Also, for those not seeing this, it is. Oh, here we go. First of all, she doesn't have an iPhone, huge red flag. Right. I know. I tell her that all the time. So we got green bubbles and gray bubbles. It's about eight gray bubble paragraphs and then he sends one line of green bubble.

Don't talk to me. green bubbles and gray bubbles. It's about eight gray bubble paragraphs and then he sends one

line of green bubble. Don't talk to me anymore. There it is. Okay. Okay. You broke up with me.

You tried leaving several times. You did and you is always a capital you. You get you read you read her

and I'll read him. Okay. You broke up with me.

You tried leaving several times.

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