BBC 5 Live

BBC 5 Live

Hello, it's us, that Mark Kermode and this Simon Mayo, and here comes our Best of 2017.

Another hastily cobbled together end of year compilation special on BBC Radio 5 Live.

And boy, have those cobblers been busy? It's been cobblers left, right and centre. Cobblers

all over the place, what a load of cobblers. I knew you'd end up there eventually.

How many times can we actually say cobblers before someone stops us?

Menly. Coming up, some of our favourite guests.

Reviews you've asked to hear again another vaguely film-related nonsense,

including in this first section Emma Stone talking La La Land, reviews of Don Cook,

plus Kinani Nunu John Wick Reeves. By the way, it's a recorded show, so obviously don't text,

because if you do, it's a waste of time and money. Shall we start with a bit of Pirates of the Caribbean?

Oh yes, let's.

The thing that's perhaps most gruelling about the film is that amidst all the

the trifon, and these are the perines, the thing, and these are what's it, the thing,

there is dialogue that appears to have been written by the team who brought us

carry on Columbus. And just to demonstrate this, I put together a little competition called

Is it Pirates of the Caribbean Salazar's Revenge, or Is it Carry on Columbus? I will give you the line.

Is this for me or is this for you?

That's for me, okay. Okay, here we go.

Fine.

A one-legged man with 18 pound balls, no wonder he walks funny.

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