My old roommate, Barney, was always very shifty.

Over the three years I lived with him, while attending graduate school together,

he changed programs twice, had countless hobbies,

friends, jobs and internships.

It became evident Barney was evasive toward commitment,

while being extremely susceptible to cutting corners

and finding the easiest way possible to get something

done. Barney Oise had a bad weight problem, which was ironic given he actually switched

to studying hospitality.

Granted he was extraordinarily lazy.

Barney never shied away from a challenge he thought would put him in a good light,

especially if he meant proving someone wrong.

These particular instances were the only times I ever saw Barney truly motivated.

However, it didn't stop him from finding the easiest way possible to complete his task.

Barney accepted his greatest challenge that our usual diner we frequented after a night of

drinking.

Of course, Barney's order occupied a whole quarter of our table,

and he showed no shame while joyously stuffing his face,

like he was racing against the clock to finish his food.

You're going to the electric chair after this?

My friend Dennis jokingly asked Barney.

A click was tight enough where we could openly joke about each other in that manner.

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