Asking my husband to reverse his vasectomy, When bridegroom language feels abusive, What is appropriate within dating? | ACW369
Ask Christopher West
Theology of the Body Institute
4.9 • 549 Ratings
🗓️ 26 January 2026
⏱️ 62 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–
Questions answered this episode:
- About 10 years ago, my husband and I rushed into a vasectomy after my third child in 3.5 years and intense anxiety/depression. I wasn’t in favor, but agreed thinking he’d reverse it if we wanted more kids—then I learned he never intended to. For eight years I felt despair and our union felt unrepairable. In recent years, Christ has healed me, and discovering TOB helped transform my husband’s heart; he’s apologized and wishes he could take it back. But he fears reversal because of painful complications. Should I ask him to reverse it for me, or leave it up to him? How does this relate to TOB’s “special responsibility” of the man to reestablish the balance of the gift?
- My question is about where the marriage imagery of Christ and the Church can fall short. Sometimes I find it hard to love God when I know that if I don’t, He has the power and authority to cast me into hell, and if this were a relationship between two sinners, it might seem abusive for one spouse to punish the other for lack of loyalty. Ezekiel 16 portrays God doing this in a spousal context, and it deeply troubles me. When I struggle with this, I shy away from Christ as Bridegroom and turn to other analogies, like Him as the vine. Can you shed some TOB light on this?
- I’ve been in a relationship for four years. We’re both believing Christians and try to live our relationship in the light of theology of the body, but lately we’re struggling with physical affection—never knowing what is too much or what is healthy since we’re not married. We’ve talked a lot, and it seems I’m having a harder time than he is. My problem is that I often find myself troubled after the fact. I’d really appreciate some advice.
Resources:
Colorado Ski Retreat with Christopher
---
Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
---
🔥 Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body
⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? Join our Patron Community!
---
---
🏔️ Pilgrimages
🧠 List of trusted counselors & psychologists
*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: michele@tobinstitute.org
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Our faithful listeners know that I've been of late sharing with you guys an app called Truthly. |
| 0:09.8 | Truthly, we've entered into a partnership with Truthly. |
| 0:12.3 | I believe in what they're doing. |
| 0:13.5 | They believe in what we're doing. |
| 0:15.4 | And our audience, who is familiar with asking questions about the Catholic faith, |
| 0:20.8 | you guys should really know about this app called Truthly, T-R-U-T-H-L-Y, |
| 0:28.4 | faithful to the Magisterium, rooted in Scripture, |
| 0:31.6 | thinking with the mind and heart of the church. |
| 0:33.3 | You can go on Truthly and ask any question about the Catholic faith, and you'll get an |
| 0:39.4 | orthodox answer, using all the technology of artificial intelligence and putting it to |
| 0:45.7 | very good use. |
| 0:47.8 | I've been using Truthely just to poke around and see what kind of answers they come up when |
| 0:52.8 | I type in certain questions. |
| 0:54.6 | And I've been impressed. I've been impressed. They're doing good stuff. And I think it is |
| 0:59.0 | definitely worth our just shouting out to our audience and say, give it a try. You can get a |
| 1:03.9 | seven-day free trial by just going to wherever you get your apps, the Google Play Spot, |
| 1:10.2 | if you're an Android person, |
| 1:11.7 | or go to the app store on the iPhone, and learn more about what the good folks are doing at Truthfully. |
| 1:24.3 | From the Theology of the Body Institute, this is the Ask Christopher West podcast. |
| 1:37.7 | Hey, Wendy. |
| 1:39.4 | Yes. |
| 1:40.5 | Remember the time we were recording a podcast and a mouse ran across the floor? |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Theology of the Body Institute, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Theology of the Body Institute and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.