Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast, where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your most important job, being a parent.

I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, practical wisdom, and insights from

parents just like you all over the world. Thank you for listening, and we hope this helps.

Are you using this power? In her book, Bringing Up Bebe, the author Pamela Druckerman talks about

the pause as the secret to French parenting. Druckerman describes it in the context of sleep

training, but the pause can actually be a great strategy for parents in all facets of their

kids' lives. When your son trips and falls, do you need to rush over?

Can you pause and let him figure out how hurt he is first or whether he wants to or needs to cry?

When your daughter comes over and starts to tell you something, do you have to complete her sentences?

Can you pause? Let her struggle with the words and work through what she's trying to say.

When your teenager announces that they're quitting the basketball team, do you have to start arguing right away? Or can you pause

and listen instead to their reasons and what they want to do instead? When your kid comes home

from college and scratches the car, do you have to get upset or can you pause and consider how almost certainly

wasn't intentional? The famous psychologist and philosopher Viktor Frankl talked about how

between the stimulus and the response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose

our response, he said. And its parents, we also have to use that response. We have to

choose our responses wisely, not reflexively. We have to suspend judgment, think things over. We have to

practice the pause. As parents who want the best for their kids, we all need a reminder, something tangible to remind us.

Difficulty is forging our kids who they're meant to be.

We have to be there for them and encourage them and believe in them.

Of course, that doesn't mean we need to do everything for them.

We need to let them struggle and emerge.

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