Are You Dating a "Nice Guy"? 11 Signs He’s Not Who He Pretends to Be | Dr. Gwen Adshead

Women of Impact

Impact Theory

Education, Society & Culture, Mental Health, Relationships, Health & Fitness

4.7 • 657 Ratings

🗓️ 4 June 2025

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Today, we're digging DEEP into a topic that's as terrifying as it is necessary—how to spot the warning signs when someone isn't who they seem to be. Seriously, this episode had me clutching my pearls and simultaneously feeling more empowered than ever. I’m bringing you someone who has literally walked into the darkest places on earth—prisons, forensic hospitals, you name it—and come out without losing her compassion or her curiosity. Dr. Gwen Adshead is a forensic psychotherapist, author of "The Devil You Know," and all-around badass when it comes to deciphering what really lies beneath the “mask of normalcy.” We talk about manipulative personalities, red flags in relationships, attachment styles, and build out a legit tool belt for keeping our power and protecting ourselves from harm. Ladies, if you’ve ever felt like you missed the signs, if you’ve ever asked yourself, “What did I not see coming?” or just want to build the skills to stand tall no matter who’s in front of you—THIS is the episode you need. Grab your notebook, because Dr. Gwen drops truth bombs, actionable red flags, and shows you how to keep your cool even in the most toxic situations. Let’s get STRONGER and SAFER together. You ready? SHOWNOTES 00:00 How Evil Can Wear a Mask: Spotting Dangerous Traits 00:06:39 The "False Mask of Normalcy" and Why We Miss the Signs 00:07:00 11 Red Flags That Reveal Who's Behind the Mask 00:19:09 What is Attachment Theory? And Why It Matters for Women 00:22:02 Why Pregnancy Triggers Domestic Violence 00:29:23 Rule Breakers and Risk Factors 00:32:08 Grandiosity, Narcissism, and Dangerous Audacity 00:34:46 Why Absolute Thinking Becomes a Trap—For Us AND Them 00:37:05 False Victimhood as Manipulation 00:39:34 How to Talk to a Psychopath: Staying Emotionally Sober 00:43:44 Protecting Your Sense of Reality 00:45:10 Building Your Personal Tool Belt: Never Let Anyone Take Your Power! FOLLOW DR. GWEN ADSHEAD: Book: The Devil You Know (available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Devil-You-Know-Gwen-Adshead/dp/198213480X ) BBC Lectures: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001rm8y (also available via YouTube search) Academic Profile: https://scholar.google.com/scholar?q=Gwen+Adshead CHECK OUT OUR SPONSORS Vital Proteins: Get 20% off by going to ⁠https://www.vitalproteins.com⁠ and entering promo code WOI at check out. BIOptimizers: Head to⁠ https://bioptimizers.com/impact ⁠and use code IMPACT for 10% off. OneSkin: Get 15% off with code LISA at ⁠https://oneskin.co ⁠ Netsuite: Download the new e-book Navigating Global Trade: 3 Insights for Leaders at ⁠http://NetSuite.com/women⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:55.4	What up my homies?
0:56.6	Let's be real, shall we?
0:58.4	So many of us women stay in situations where just deep down, we know something just isn't right.
1:04.1	But we didn't actually have the words or the understanding of what was actually happening
1:08.2	and we didn't trust ourselves or our guts enough to shine a light on it
1:12.3	or to walk away. I'm Lisa Billu and this is Women of Impact and guys I really show up every day
1:19.0	for us women to be able to take the tours so that we can make sure that we stop second-guessing
1:24.3	ourselves because we have been doing this a whole life and when I look at all the
1:28.9	things in my own life, all the successes and the failures, it has all come from me starting
1:34.0	to trust that I am able to be the type of person that can learn a lesson, whether it's a success
	...

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