Anxiety, Worries and What if’s-Rewiring Anxiety through Intentional Risk Assessment- Acceptable Risk

Therapy in a Nutshell

Therapy in a Nutshell -Emma McAdam

Mental Health, Education, Health & Fitness:mental Health, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.8 • 658 Ratings

🗓️ 28 December 2020

⏱️ 19 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

So here’s another of the most common questions I get on my “Rewiring the Anxious Brain” video- People asked “What if the dog bites you?” Now in that video I was explaining how when you avoid something it makes your anxiety go up, and this is really harmful when you avoid something that feels dangerous, but is actually safe- like public speaking, taking a test, or asking for a raise. So I used the example of being afraid of dogs and then explained how gradual exposure can help you overcome that fear by gradually spending time with dogs. But of course, when making a video about anxiety, the anxious people watching the video are going to say- but how can I do that, what if the dog bites you? Many people with anxiety focus on the worst-case scenario, instead of focusing on the potential for growth and healing. And that’s because when your brain is in anxiety mode, it’s attuned to threats, it only notices and pays attention to the potential dangers around you. But dogs can actually be dangerous. So when you’re in anxiety mode the 1 in 1,000 chance of being bit by a family’s pet dog feels like a serious, immediate, most likely occurrence. In Anxiety mode our brain is going to assume the worst about so many things- “What if they all hate me?” “What if I get Covid from my groceries?” “What if the car swerves into my lane?” It’s so easy to get wrapped up in all the “What-ifs” that you completely lose sight of your goals. Like overcoming anxiety, or visiting your son who has a dog. But there are some practical steps you can take to manage your brilliantly anxious brain instead of letting anxiety run your life. First realize that your brain’s most natural job is to “prevent dying” to keep you from bad things happening. And unlike other mammals, that are mostly instinctual about these things, running from an immediate threat like a tiger, and then relaxing when the threat is gone. Our brain has the ability to imagine danger in the future, remember danger in the past, and that makes us feel like we’re in danger in the present moment. But just because our brain is really good at imagining dangers, doesn’t mean that avoiding those fears is the way for us to live a good, happy life. I think most people with anxiety can see how feeling anxious all the time and avoiding stuff is making their lives worse… Thanks BetterHelp for sponsoring the video: BetterHelp: Professional, Affordable Online Counseling starting at around $65 a week https://www.betterhelp.com/therapyinanutshell Learn more in one of my in-depth mental health courses: https://courses.therapyinanutshell.com/?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=12282020 Support my mission on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/therapyinanutshell Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.therapynutshell.com Check out my favorite self-help books: https://kit.co/TherapyinaNutshell/best-self-help-books Therapy in a Nutshell, and the information provided by Emma McAdam, is solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and is not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health. If you are in crisis please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ or 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or your local emergency services. Copyright Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello everyone and welcome to therapy in a nutshell.
0:09.9	I'm Emma McAdam, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and this is the podcast where I condense mental health skills to get to bite-sized nuggets of help.
0:19.6	Today we're in my garden, and we're going to be talking about
0:22.6	dealing with what-ifs. So your brain is super extra at imagining danger. But if you let anxiety
0:31.1	and what-ifs make your choices, your world is going to shrink and you're going to feel more
0:35.8	anxious and powerless. So instead, we're going to feel more anxious and powerless.
0:38.3	So instead, we're going to talk about regaining your power through careful risk assessment
0:43.3	and choosing acceptable risk.
0:49.3	This video is sponsored by BetterHelp, where you can get professional, affordable counseling online for around $65 a week.
1:01.0	Check out the link in the description for 10% off your first month.
1:05.0	So here's another of the most common questions I get on my rewiring the anxious brain video.
1:10.0	So people ask, what if the dog bites
1:13.1	you? Now, in that video, I was explaining how when you avoid something, it makes your anxiety go up.
1:18.8	And this is really harmful when you avoid something that feels dangerous, but is actually safe.
1:25.0	So this is something like public speaking or taking a test or asking for a raise.
1:30.6	In that video, the example I used was being afraid of dogs. And then I explained how gradual exposure
1:36.7	can help you overcome that fear by gradually spending time with dogs. But of course, when making a
1:43.4	video about anxiety, the anxious people watching
1:45.9	this video are going to say, but how can I do that? What if the dog bites you? Now, many people
1:51.9	with anxiety focus on the worst case scenario instead of focusing on the potential for growth
1:58.1	and healing. And that's because when your brain is in anxiety mode, it's attuned to threats.
2:04.4	It only notices and pays attention to the potential dangers around you.
	...

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