Anxiety Recovery ... What Am I Supposed To Think About? (Ep 57)
Disordered: Anxiety Help
Josh Fletcher and Drew Linsalata
4.9 • 665 Ratings
🗓️ 12 April 2024
⏱️ 43 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
"I know I'm not supposed to focus inward or engage with my anxious or intrusive thoughts, but what am I supposed to think about?!"
This week Josh and Drew answer an excellent question from a listener that hasn't really been asked before. What do you do when your anxious thoughts keep coming even when you don't want them to come, and when you insist that you MUST only focus outward because that's how recovery is done?
Spoiler alert ... if you're in the business of trying to stop your thoughts or never hear or notice them so you can perfectly focus outward to recover, you can get out of that business right now. Anxious thoughts focused on your internal state - thoughts about you and how you feel - are going to come no matter what we do. This is normal and expected for all humans.
The secret sauce here is in the continued practice of noticing those thoughts when they happen, seeing that they exist, and not launching into thought stopping or thought control responses. Its OK to have whatever thoughts your brain creates. See them, acknowledge that you are thinking like all humans do, refrain from judging and evaluating the thoughts as proper or improper, then do your best to bring them with you as you do life.
Is this frustrating at times? You bet it is. Be nice to yourself when you get frustrated and impatient with this process, and always remember that you simply cannot demand to not have a thought. Insisting that you must only think outward thoughts is a dead end and never works, so soften that stance, let your brain do its thing, and try not to treat your thoughts like they require control, management, or engineering.
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Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out Worry and Rumination Explained, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolveable problems.
https://bit.ly/worryrumination
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Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast?
Visit us on the web at https://disordered.fm
Disclaimer: Disordered is not therapy or a replacement for therapy. Listening to Disordered does not create a therapeutic relationship between you and the hosts of the podcast. Information here is provided for psychoeducational purposes. As always, when you have questions about your well-being, please consult your mental health and/or medical care providers. If you are having a mental health crisis, always reach out immediately for in-person help.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Good afternoon to you both. I've done a lot of personal development, but I think it's made me focus |
| 0:09.1 | inward. So my question is, which I think is going to help a lot of people I'm hoping it does, |
| 0:13.9 | is when you're in bed, driving, go to the gym, what do you think about? What can I do to keep my mind busy? And sometimes |
| 0:22.6 | when I work as well, because my attention goes inwards. And what happens is my thoughts are in |
| 0:29.6 | pictures. So I just stare at a picture, then it's like a conveyor bed, then another picture. And I just |
| 0:34.6 | ponder. I don't say anything, I don't do anything. |
| 0:40.2 | What is that about? What is going on there? |
| 0:49.9 | I really want to get over this because anxiety can't make you feel quite selfish in a way. |
| 0:54.8 | And it's the last thing you want to do because all of your attention is inwards, |
| 0:57.2 | and I'm desperately trying to keep it upwards. |
| 1:00.2 | Thanks, guys. Thanks. Take care. |
| 1:09.2 | Welcome to Disordered. This is episode 57 entitled, What Am I Supposed to Think About? |
| 1:12.6 | My name is Joshua Fletcher, also known as Anxiety Josh, and I'm a psychotherapist based in the UK who specializes in working with anxiety disorders, more so a previous sufferer of several anxiety disorders. |
| 1:25.1 | The co-host is podcast, an author of the book, and how does that make you feel? |
| 1:29.1 | And I am Drew Lin Salata. I am a therapist in training in the U.S. in New York, also specializing |
| 1:34.2 | in anxiety and anxiety disorders, also an author, clearly a podcaster because I'm co-hosting this |
| 1:38.9 | podcast, I guess a psychoeducator and advocate in this community, and also a former sufferer of anxiety and depression and probably diagnosable OCD for a good portion of my life. Here we are at episode 57. What are we talking about today? What a question? Love the question. Thank you, question, Sandorina. Yeah. What am I supposed to think about? Really good one. We've not really covered this. Obviously, there was a reference to the inward stuff, the inwards compulsion, which the person |
| 2:06.4 | who sent the question is probably aware of. |
| 2:08.1 | Sounds like your awareness is great. |
| 2:10.7 | So well done. |
| 2:11.7 | I'm really aware of everything. |
| 2:13.1 | But what am I supposed to do now? |
... |
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