The Bugle, audio newspaper for a visual world.

Hello Bugleers, I am Andy Zoltzman, this is issue 4216 of the Bugle and welcome for the

first time in Bugle history to the 26th biggest island in the world, Tasmania. The sparsely populated

blob that dangles happily in the ocean off the south-eastern corner of the Australia

at Glanmas, like a backup emergency New Zealand. It's my first time in Tasmania, I'm here

as you probably know Bugleers by now, I came out to Australia to cover the Ash's cricket

series. The final match was supposed to be in Perth, but Perth decided that England would

have been thrashed by then, so what was the point? I think that was the reasoning. So they've

dumped us all in Tasmania and it seems lovely. If you can make yourself forget about the history

of ethnic cleansing, slavery, abductions and disease spreading the wiped out of local population,

which as a British person I've been trained to do from my earliest school and it helps us

get out of bed in the morning. Other than that, it seems lovely, it's famous for its devils,

of course, so I've not seen one yet and some doubt has been raised in recent weeks,

ever whether or not the Tasmanian devil, the famously stroppy and scruffy-less marsupial,

sort of like a cross between a kangaroo and a Trump supporting anti-vaxer, is actually

an agent of BL's above himself, or not the evidence, well it's not compelling, I mean, if the

devil has indeed chosen Tasmania as a launch pad for conquering the world, he's not exactly given

himself the biggest possible audience. This place is around a roundabout 0.3% full, I reckon,

but it looks lovely in this cricket effort, which is always good. Perhaps the devil isn't as

fussed about market share as the media would have you believe, or just can't be asked anymore,

given how humanity seems to be doing a perfectly decent job of destroying the shit out of itself

without him even having to put in a regular 9-5. I am looking out of my hotel window now at the 1200

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