It's that time.

Lock and load.

The Michael Derry Show is on the air. On the first day of Kwanza, my children asked me, Mama, what is Quanza for anyway?

On the second day of Quinsa some lady bothered me, I curse her out and I say,

No, I don't want no Old Amil pictures and quit calling over here.

On the third day of Quanza, I went out to the stove.

I needed beer and cigarettes, but they was closed, so I smashed

out the windows, did a drive-by and curse them all out. On the fourth day of Quinsa, I turned on the TV,

young and the restless, all of my children's one day to live, and then Oprah at four o'clock. On the fifth day of Quanza, my children's one day to live and then Oprah at four o'clock. On the fifth day of quons,

my check came in the mail, AFDC. Thank you, Lord. I said, come on, kids. Let's go to the store

for some collard greens, ham hocks, and some cheese.

On the sixth day of quons, the police rang the bell.

They served a warrant.

I nearly passed it out.

But it was okay.

Some woman had said I stole her weeks, but I told them all I would give

them back anyway. On the seventh day of Kwanza, I pulled myself a drink. I drank 40 ounces

got really full, then lost my mind. I drove down the street cursing out everyone I saw.

Then I bashed the cat-like upside of Dirk Queen.

On the eighth day of Quanza, I bought a TV guy.

Not much had happened.

I was hung over from a bad headache from Schlitzmau liquor, boom.

...