Hi, this is Natalie Hoffman of Flying Free Now, and you're listening to the Flying Free

podcast, a support resource for women of faith, looking for hope and healing from hidden

emotional and spiritual abuse.

Welcome to episode 77 of the Flying Free Podcast. Today I have Becky and Rachel with me

hello. Hello and we are going to be answering a question from a

listener and here it is I've read in your book that most abuse victims aren't

actually cod dependent but have similar characteristics from enduring

abuse. How do you tell if you actually are cod dependent as a counselor has told

me or if it is a symptom of emotional abuse from my husband.

I did grow up in an environment where I was responsible for my mom's feelings,

so maybe I am co-dependent.

What is the difference and what does that mean for my own recovery?

Rachel, I said a definition.

Go ahead.

Well, I could have asked this question because I was responsible for my mom's feelings growing up too and

co-dependence is a term that's thrown around pretty casually I think and it's not always

helpful I think it's rarely helpful in circumstances

that we are talking about.

Because co-dependence is defined by excessive emotional

or psychological reliance on a partner typically one who

requires support because of illness or addiction. So it came out of

it was popular in the 70s and 80s and the 12-step community adopted it because there was a you know situations where both you know one spouse was reliant on alcohol, but the other spouse was also reliant on alcohol,

...