Alfie Kohn encourages us to raise “reflective rebels”

Zen Parenting Radio

Todd and Cathy Adams

Education, Philosophy, Parenting, Self-improvement, Kids & Family, Society & Culture

4.8 • 636 Ratings

🗓️ 24 October 2014

⏱️ 43 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Our guest Alfie Kohn, author of The Myth of the Spoiled Child, says that the negativity thrown at parents and the supposedly narcissistic kids they are raising is unfounded. Kohn says parents should work to raise kids with high self esteem, and that the fashionable belief that kids must develop grit and self-discipline through failure and suffering is unproven and often counterproductive. A few of the topics we discuss with Alfie: Warm responsive parenting is often confused with over indulgent and permissive parenting Punishment and rewards don't work Competition is uniquely counterproductive We want to raise "reflective rebels" Other Resources Cathy's 3rd book, Living What You Want Your Kids To Learn- The Power of Self-Aware Parenting, is now on sale! Scheduled ship date is first week of November. Go here to order your book. Todd co-facilitates The Tribe and is now accepting applications for his 2015 retreat. Highlights of last years retreat can be found here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rd4HfGvOl2k&index=19&list=PLJATAQGVhEVv7KoAcf-V7UKiN0_De-wqn Click the following links to purchase Cathy's books The Self-Aware Parent Part 1 & and Part 2 Click here to find her blog, and click here to find her Chicago Parent column. Todd has a few spots opening for his Men's Group. Email me @ [email protected] Tree of Life Chiropractic Care have some interesting workshops planned. An outline can be found here. If you shop Amazon by going through our website first (there is an amazon link on the bottom right hand of our home page), a portion of your sale will help fund our Be U program. Thanks for supporting us! Check out our new website & be sure to sign up to get all new podcast sent direct to your inbox @ ZPR. We would love to hear any comments from the show by sending us an email @ [email protected] You can be sure to hear more by liking our Facebook page @ https://www.facebook.com/ZenParenting How important is a good smile? Just ask our new partner John J Kelly DDS. They are located on the northwest side of Chicago and will meet all of your family's dental needs. Painting or remodeling? Don't forget about our parnter Avid Co. Looking for a Vitamix blender? Don't forget to use our coupon code 06-007296 for free shipping.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Hello, this is Todd.
0:01.0	This is Kathy.
0:01.7	And this is Conversations with People We Love, brought to you by BU Incorporated.
0:06.1	On this show, we talk with authors and we talk with teachers, we talk with friends,
0:10.2	and anybody that has a story to share that can help us open our heart and be more aware of who we are.
0:15.2	Hope you enjoy the show.
0:20.0	So there's a set of complaints we hear about young people these days, that they're entitled,
0:24.4	overpraised, and grow up thinking they're more special than they really are.
0:27.8	But in his new book, The Myth of the Spoiled Child, writer Alfie Cohen says that the negativity thrown at permissive parents
0:34.7	and the supposedly narcissistic kids they raise are unfounded.
0:39.0	Cohen says parents should work to raise kids with high self-esteem and that the fashionable
0:44.1	belief that kids must develop grit and self-discipline through failure and suffering
0:49.5	is unproven and often counterproductive. So we have Alfie on with us today.
0:54.7	Alfie, hello. How are you?
0:56.3	Nice to be here.
0:57.7	Nice to have you.
0:58.8	I have literally pages of notes that my wife got mad at me for saying,
1:02.2	listen, we need to, we need to tighten this up a bit.
1:07.0	He would have kept you on for three hours, so we can't do that. And I've read a handful of books,
1:10.9	but this is one that certainly spoke to me as much as any other. So I'm really excited, but I just
1:16.0	kind of want to jump right into it. I don't know if it was your first chapter or what, but you
1:20.9	talked a lot about how we as adults romanticize the good old days. And you also talked about
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Todd and Cathy Adams, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Todd and Cathy Adams and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.