Hello and welcome to opening arguments. This is Vapid Response Wednesday. I'm Thomas. That over there's

real life immigration attorney Matt Cameron. How are you doing, Matt? All right, back from the Virgin

Islands, back to two feet of snow. feeling good. Back to work. Yep, he had to go clear the evidence

of him being in files. I think he's done that. Oh, man, yeah, we're talking more Epstein, but in a

slightly different, well, yeah, we're not going to go through the files, right? But we are going

to go through some of the excuses and takes of people who are in the files, which is, I think,

more fun. And some of my favorite and worst and creepiest responses to having been outed in the

files. We've got some real gems here. And a couple of emails we haven't looked at too.

But yeah, some fallout stuff. Doing some follow-out.

All right. And of course, joined by producer Lydia Smith. How are you doing?

Hello, pretty good. I was not expecting to have a Unabomber connection as part of our discussions

today, but we are going to have a Unabomber connection. So one of the victims we'll be talking about

found himself in the Epstein files.

It'd be funny if it was the Unabomber was in the files like from prison. Like God, what can't these people do? I'm pretty sure. I think someone like looked it up and he's like explicitly not in the files anywhere like not even his name. I could be wrong. But I feel like I was like, you know, He's been in prison for horrible, horrible people.

And yeah, and it's like, well, Ted Kaczynski's not even in there.

Uniportez. But I feel like it was like, you know, all these horrible, horrible people. And, yeah, and it's like, well, Ted Kaczynski's not even in there. Unabomber cleared of sex trafficking. Yeah. Didn't it take forever to catch? I might be mixing up my, my unabomers. Yeah. But didn't it take forever to catch him? It would be funny if he was also gallivanting with. Sacramento, California, right? Wasn't he? His brother turned in after saying in the manifesto. That's right. Yeah. He was like a professor, right? Or something or some sort of... It was very well-educated. Anyway, every other person in the Epstein files is apparently a professor of some kind. A lot of, a lot of academics, a lot of people in government.

Yeah, I can't wait to go through more of it. Matt, why don't you give us a little more preview before we go to our first break? Sure. We're going to start off with a muse douche from one of our favorite dishes, Alan Dershowitz, speaking of law professors. Really, he's like the inaugural. I think so. It should be renamed the Alan Dershowitz Award for a moustic.

Yeah. inaugural. I think so. It should be renamed the Alan Dershowitz Award for the Moose Dish.

Yeah. Our, our, our, our, our, our esteemed Alan Dershowich, the Moose chair.

I don't think anybody listening or watching needs to be reminded of the many connections that Dershowitz had to Epstein will talk about.

But we're going to check out in particular a 1997 op-ed, which is it's not aged well. It's aged about as badly as anything can age that they could have written. And it's also legally incorrect. So that's fun too. Have we mentioned to you, Matt, that when we went on God-Offa-Movil movies, we did No Safe Spaces. And Dershowitz was in that briefly. And he managed to say in three seconds, two of the funniest things that don't age well at all. He said, did we tell you this already? No. No. Oh, yeah. He said, one thing he just, again, off-handed remark, if you want pleasure, go get a massage. It's one of the things. Yeah.

In response to like these kids these days are too coddled at college. From an old Russian lady, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Keep take your underpants on. So good. And then the other thing was, and this was in 20, what, 18 or something? 2018 was when it was filmed. Yeah. and he was about the, about the... It's Charlottesville, Riley.

...