I never graduated college.

I never even went to college.

I went to the University of Digging Ditches on construction sites.

Go fighting shovels!

So why should you listen to me?

Hmm, let's see.

Well, I run my own business that I built myself.

So let me give you a couple of tips.

I hire and fire people like you all the time.

And I've seen a pattern with your generation.

Something I call the language of losers.

Let me give you some examples.

I did my best.

My assistant told me this once after screwing up royally.

And I said, Matt, if you did your best and you screwed up royally,

then I need to fire you right now.

The answer is either, I didn't do my best.

I'll do better next time.

Or I'm drunk right now and need to sit down.

So the phrase I've drilled into my employees is,

don't do your best.

Do my best.

...