Yesterday I was sitting with T out on the deck for that brief window of sunshine and the morning. It was wonderful

It was warm. I was in a t-shirt water avenue coffee and hand and we're just having a nice chat

But we were actually in conversation around some of my wife's health issues

Most of you know she has chronic health condition and Lyme disease and had a recent diagnosis

From a neurologist that's pretty bad and has to do with the muscles in her face and the long-term stuff

We don't know this not for sure thing yet. We're gonna wait for a second and third diagnosis

But she was just chatting with me about you know a few years ago in her health

Which has been not great for a long time, but really got a lot worse about three years ago

She had this moment of like intense prayer with God not like daily prayer like intent

You know what I mean like intense prayer with God and where she basically in her own language said God

I'm up for whatever like if it's cancer. I'll deal with cancer if it's a wheelchair

I'll deal with that just please do not let it be my face anything but my face and

Now the diagnosis is in and it's her face and

We were chatting this morning in route to the morning gathering and we were laughing about Teresa

Vavella's line about the dark night of the soul which we'll talk about in a few weeks ago where she once said to God

If this is how you treat your friends no wonder you have so few of them and

And there's something she said that not me again. I promise I'm just the messenger

But there's something to that

Have you ever been at a spot in your life where man?

You're up against a wall like that. You just think man. How do I handle this?

Where is God in this or is he anywhere or am I alone in it and how do I carry this with grace as an apprentice of Jesus

John chapter 21 this is our third and I promise final week in John 21

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