Hey just our every listener today I'm going to answer patron emails.

This first email is from patron Kim she writes

I am really suffering right now yesterday I got an abortion at 13 weeks. It was a hard choice to come to for me. The pregnancy

was unplanned and I originally wanted abortion, but then I decided to keep the baby, and then later I decided to get an abortion.

The father was very involved and was really sad when I told him.

We were supposed to be together, but with the with the pandemic he was stuck

overseas. It was so difficult for me to be alone. We've both lost our work and our relationship is new, so my fears led me to the abortion.

Immediately after, I feel regret. I feel the most pain and grief I have ever felt in my life.

I feel like I have killed this baby.

By the way, am pro-choice and I'm non-religious. I have been trying to

find support but it seems that most are religion-based. I am deciding to treat this as a real grief and I'm trying

to find your episodes on grief and trying to find your book on grief.

Do you know anything about abortion and guilt and grief?

Do you think part of what I'm feeling is societal pressure?

Anything would be helpful.

End of email.

Yeah, this is awful, especially since you had for a while resolved to keep the child. For that span of time you imagined having that

child and raising that child and seeing that child grow up and going to school and you know having maybe their first prom or

something and so on and now all that is over and that is incredibly sad. A huge loss for all involved.

It hurts because you are human. It wouldn't... Now I will say for some people when they get an abortion, some of you

listening out there have probably had abortions. And there's varying reactions. For some people, it doesn't produce the same meaning

and the same amount of grief.

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