All right guys we have some big news the bad vibes only to or continues this spring I promised you we would do more shows and you know what I kept this promise we are starting out Friday March 3rd in my new hometown of Phoenix Arizona and then we are heading to Austin Atlanta Durham Milwaukee St. Louis Lawrence and Boulder tickets go on sale Friday January 13th at T T F A dot org but but if you're one of our substacks subscribers you'll get an early

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I'm nor McNairney and this is terrible thanks for asking.

There comes a time in every romantic relationship where you need to talk about where things are going.

Okay you got to be honest about what you want and don't want out of the relationship is this heading toward marriage are you going to live together and if so where you going to live and do you want kids.

That's a big one because kids are a big commitment it's a lifetime commitment and not just for your lifetime you are committing to their lifetime and Mark's girlfriend wants kids and he does not.

And that's a fully valid life choice a lot of people don't want kids they are one way to find meaning in life they're not the only way.

But Mark's decision is a little bit deeper than just a preference it goes a little further than just simply not wanting kids.

Okay so Mark I would love for you to tell me what did your mom look like.

Wow my mom was five foot eight she had wavy brown hair and she wore glasses kind of I mean I think she felt that they were pretty artsy for her time when she was younger she used to wear like the cat style glasses from.

Whenever that was like the 50s or 60s she was really the most social person I've ever encountered for sure she used to probably starting in September just have our kitchen table full of Christmas cards this is pre social media so she didn't have any way of getting a hold of people on the inner web so she just would.

Pile Christmas cards on the counter and then write personalized Christmas cards to probably 200 maybe more of her friends from the states like not just a generic letter she would write personalized things to every single.

Friend of her so that she could think of and then our wall in return come November and December our wall in the kitchen was just everybody else's cards back to her it was pretty amazing.

When Mark was 17 his mom got sick with cancer and she didn't want him to worry so she kept it from him as long as she could she wanted him to enjoy his last year of high school and he did but when he was about to go to college he knew she was sick and she asked him will you stay home with me and dad will you help out and Mark said yeah mom of course so well all of his friends went off to college.

Mark stayed in his small hometown in Canada his girlfriend Karen was just going into 12th grade and he cared about her a lot so he broke up with her.

I didn't want to be home and have that be the reason I was home I didn't want to have my mindset so focused on Karen that I wasn't there for my mom during that time.

So yeah yeah I think that makes sense and also young relationships are really consuming and what's even more consuming Mark is that you are coming of age and having a really singular experience.

I don't think I have to do a survey of your town to assume that you are probably the only kid your age taking care of your mother.

Yeah I can't I can't think of anyone else at the moment for sure.

It was just Mark just Mark spending a few hours a day escaping to the sanctuary of his church playing the drums alone in a big empty space coming home to keep his mom company and bring her water and love her.

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