Welcome back to our special four-part series dedicated to search and rescue.

This is episode four in the last in the series, so if you haven't listened to episode

one through three, you'll want to go back and start there.

Most search and rescue personnel don't want to be referred to as heroes, but as recreationalists,

we often voice that title upon them. There's a selflessness required to take to the mountains

in all manner of poor conditions to help a stranger find their way home.

There's sacrifice too. And as much as we'd like to believe it, the heroes of our stories

aren't invincible. They're regular people like us, skilled, yes, but just as susceptible to

the perils of nature, fallible, mortal. It's the hope of all search and rescue teams to never

face that mortality on the job, but sometimes the danger is inescapable, and the effects can last

for decades. I made a decision to survive. You're in that survival mode. The idea of dying

wasn't in my head. I knew immediately it was the worst case scenario. I was in a fight for my

life situation. Whenever you walk out on these trails, you're in their house.

I'm Louisa Albinese and you're listening to Out-Alive by Backpacker. In each episode of this

podcast, we'll bring you real stories of real people who survived the unsurvivable.

I saw the ropes sift through the rappel ring, and I couldn't do anything.

Learn what went wrong, what went right, and how you can escape if the worst case scenario happens to you.

There is no way we would find anybody alive.

My name is Joel Antini, and I live in Conway, New Hampshire in the heart of the White Mountains.

I'm a climber. I've been a climber for, I hate to admit it, but a little over 50 years now,

and I've been a professional climbing guide for 47 of those years. I got into climbing because

a childhood friend of mine from my hometown asked me if I wanted to go. I said yes, and the

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