.

Joe Biden came to our apartment building in New York for a fundraiser last week,

and the lobby was full of men in dark suits and sunglasses and nearby streets were closed,

and I never got the chance to tell him that he really needs to find

a good recreational activity that will brand him favorably for the millions of Americans

who get their news from photographs rather than reading text.

Standing at a lectern, reading a speech is not enough. A candidate for president

needs to look good while having fun, preferably in the great outdoors.

John F. Kennedy was a sailor, and that image of him at the helm of his boat,

the honey fits, steering into the Atlantic waves was our first and lasting impression of him.

He looked great with the wind in his face. Ronald Reagan looked great on horseback,

thanks to his acting experience. He also looked very good cutting brush with a chain saw.

He had a fine smile, and he easily defeated Jimmy Carter,

who, against the advice of advisors ran in a road race and collapsed,

and the secret service had to carry him away looking like death on toast.

Serious candidates should avoid running at all costs. Runners don't look good,

especially after six or eight miles, which is where the press would set up its cameras.

Your stride would be choppy and your face would look stricken.

If you stumbled, it would be seen by 50 million people and millions of dollars in advertising

would go down the toilet that one stumble would outweigh all of the expensive advertising.

Then Reagan beat Walter Mondale, whose sport was fishing a fisherman against a horseman, no contest.

Walter Mondale should have gone fishing for tuna out on the Atlantic

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