A Cathartic Year End Rant (w/ Mike Mitchell)

Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer

Headgum & Nicole Byer

Interviews, Dating, Nicole Byer, Tinder, Therapy, Advice, Stories, Romance, Date, Sexuality, Relationship, Comedy Interviews, Relationships, Encounters, Health & Fitness, Love, Hookups, Couples, Hookup, Interview, Dating Apps, Raya, Bumble, Comedy, Sex, Society & Culture, Podcast, Single

4.8 • 15.6K Ratings

🗓️ 19 December 2025

⏱️ 96 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Happy holidays! You’re getting an xxxtra special xxxtra long holiday episode with Santa Claus himself (Mike Mitchell - Doughboys podcast, Twisted Metal). He joins Elf Nicole to complain about why Santas are getting too hot and buff, and Nicole reveals the time she was fired for being too jolly.

They talk about Mitch’s journey with long COVID, the struggle of losing libido from medications, and their shared experiences losing weight. Has it helped their sexual health? Plus, Mitch shares a truly wild dating story where his date asked someone else to hook up with her. They discuss why the holidays are secretly a very horny time, debate what to do if your partner cooks a terrible festive meal, and take a moment to vent about the current state of streamers and Hollywood.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Check out Nicole's review of Sizzler on the Doughboys podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tvg7enGnuOU&list=PL6J5Hwj-9uXlVJHKkALbQNpdEZL3kAAbq

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

Aura Frame: Exclusive $35 off Carver Mat at https://on.auraframes.com/DATEME. Promo Code DATEME

NOCD: If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started: https://learn.nocd.com/DATEME.

Cash App: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3v6r90n6 #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

Nicole's book, #VERYFAT #VERYBRAVE: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Ho! Ho! Ho! You can hear us! But you can't see how cute we look! You can also watch this episode on our YouTube channel. The link is in the show notes. I'm an elf and Mitch is Santa. And we have a merry time. Check it out!
0:17.0	This is a headgum podcast. The weight is over. Dive into Audubles' most anticipated collection,
0:25.7	the best of 2025, featuring top audiobooks, podcasts, and originals across all genres. Our
0:33.2	editors have carefully curated this year's must-listens, from brilliant hidden gems to the
0:39.4	busiest new releases. Every title in this collection has earned its spot. This is your go-to for the
0:45.8	absolute best in 2025 audio entertainment. Whether you love thrillers, romance, or non-fiction,
0:52.2	your next favorite listen awaits.
0:59.1	Discover why there's more to imagine when you listen at audible.com slash best of the year.
1:03.3	What is one of the worst dates you've been on?
1:07.2	When I went on a date with a, I took her out to dinner, I thought she was really cute.
1:09.2	And then we went back to Bird's Bar.
1:27.8	And there was a UCB improv friend there, and she told him, let's go to your house and have, and fuck. And using those words exactly. And could you hear it? Or did he tell you if he said that? He told me afterwards. He was like, she just asked me to go back to my place and have sex. And I was like, oh. I'm on a date with her right now.
1:32.1	Why won't you date me?
1:33.9	Why won't you date me?
1:35.9	Why won't you date me?
1:39.7	Please tell me why. Oh, ho, ho, ho!
1:47.8	Merry Christmas!
1:50.1	It's me, Nicole Beyer, and this is another episode of Why Won't You Date Me?
1:54.5	A podcast for me, Nicole Beyer, was trying to figure out why I was so single, even though you could come in the air and tell me it was a snowflick.
2:03.4	My guest today is Santa Claus.
2:08.6	My boss.
2:10.3	Yeah, that's right.
	...

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