986: Why Women Leaders Freeze in High-Stakes Moments (and What to Do Instead) | Leadership Mindset

Shameless Leadership

Sara Dean

Self-improvement, How To, Business, Management, Education

4.7 • 800 Ratings

🗓️ 7 April 2026

⏱️ 26 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Why do many women leaders freeze in high-stakes moments even when they know exactly what to say? If this is you, you’re definitely not alone. This episode breaks down what is really happening in these moments and the communication skills gap that holds women back in leadership: the freeze response, the over-explanation, and the impulse to soften a message until it loses all its power. If you're a woman in leadership who (like many of my clients and me!) has ever walked out of a crucial conversation feeling like you left something unsaid, this one is for you. In this episode, we explore: Why the freeze response shows up for women leaders - and why it's not a confidence problem The hidden cost of over-explaining in high-stakes moments (and how it undermines your executive presence) How workplace communication patterns are shaped by social conditioning, not capability What emotional intelligence actually looks like when the pressure is on Practical tools for women leaders to show up with clarity and authority in crucial conversations How to release perfectionism and control when the stakes are high The impulse to shut down is a default that is not serving you. While it may be a deeply ingrained protection mechanism, it’s preventing you from taking up the space you deserve to own. It’s time to set some new defaults so you can hold any conversation, articulate your thoughts even when uncomfortable, and trust yourself to share your ideas in a way that calls people in. With just a few simple steps, you can begin to set new defaults to stay present, nimble, and assertive in high-stakes moments. Links Mentioned: Free Workshop on April 16th: Trust Your Voice: Communicate with Courage When the Stakes Are High: https://saradean.com/trust Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:28.7	welcome to shameless leadership i'm your host sarah dean this show is for women, transgender people, non-binary folks, as well as allies, who are committed to advancing their leadership while also advancing the leadership of those around them. In each episode, we will offer practical tips, leadership strategies, and inspiring stories to help you become a more confident, compassionate,
0:55.1	and inclusive leader. The truth is, you were born to lead. What might happen for you if you
1:00.6	were to wholeheartedly embrace that part of yourself? So let's start now, together.
1:05.5	Hello, shameless leaders. Today we're talking about why women leaders freeze in high stakes
1:10.8	moments. And this topic is
1:14.6	something that comes up a lot in the work I'm currently doing with women, whether I'm in a
1:20.6	training, leading a workshop, meeting women of ed events after keynoting on stages, or whether
1:26.5	I'm on coaching calls. And this is coming up a lot of my
1:28.8	coaching calls recently. I'm hearing about women who find themselves in a high stakes moment situation
1:34.5	conversation and they freeze when there's an opportunity to take a stand, to share an opinion,
1:43.0	to share maybe a dissenting opinion, to share a new idea,
1:46.0	to stand up for themselves, to be a self-advocator, to advocate for someone else on their team
1:51.1	or someone else that they care about. And when this comes up in these conversations, I first
1:55.7	of all, always feel very empathetic because this is something I relate to. And the way that I relate
2:00.5	to this is that I've been
2:02.4	in so many situations and I know you all can relate to experiencing this in some way at some point.
2:09.1	I've been in so many situations where something is said in a moment or I'm in a high-stakes
	...

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